First date - conclusions. Will there be a second date? Shall we analyze? The dangers of bad dates

In order not to waste time, keep your ears open: observe, listen, remember.

It is important:

How does he speak about his family?
If he speaks warmly and respectfully about his parents, he has a good chance of starting his own family. A happy childhood is the capital that ensures our confidence and success in adulthood.

Keep in mind that if he is in a state of “family conflict,” then if the relationship develops, this will become your common problem.

How does he treat service personnel (in a cafe, club, etc.)
Service workers operate on the principle “the customer is always right” and are therefore extremely vulnerable. If your companion demonstrates “lordly manners” in front of the “serf people”, you should think very seriously.

How does he eat
For most women, this is an important compatibility test. If you already dislike the sight of a guy diligently chewing his steak opposite you, then what will happen next?

How he jokes
If people laugh at the same things together, they will at least become good buddies or friends. A man's sense of humor is one of those qualities that automatically attracts a woman. That's how we are made. If a man knows how to joke, that’s sexy.

What does he think about friendship?
If he lives according to the principle of Stenka Razin, who easily “threw the princess into the oncoming wave,” only because his comrades decided that he “traded us for a woman,” then you can’t expect mercy from his friends.
There is a type of man who will fight for his friend, but calls you bunny because he doesn’t remember exactly what your name is - Masha or Dasha.

Does he have a hobby?
The situation with hobbies is about the same as with friends. There are guys for whom a bike (computer, skate, kite, etc.) is an object of such worship that it’s unlikely that there will be an adequate place nearby.
But when a person has one hobby - falling asleep in front of the TV, this is also not the best option.
It is advisable to find a guy who is able to maintain a state of “golden mean”.

What is he aiming for?
A purposeful person is immediately visible. His energy and habit of thinking ahead give him away. If a guy likes you, he will definitely tell you about what he wants to achieve in life. At least to make an impression.
And here you can see for yourself whether your individual plans have points of intersection.

What does he say about his "ex"
Ideally, a real man, speaking about his “ex,” should act on the same principle as with the deceased: either good or nothing.
But in reality this does not always work out. The main thing is that his negative attitude does not go off scale. After all, strong emotions are, first and foremost, emotions. Not only is there one step from love to hate, but also back.

What is he even talking about?
The topics we choose to talk about after the initial embarrassment wears off and we stop mumbling something unintelligible about the weather give us away.
After all, they demonstrate the inner world of a person. One will tell you about your impressions of a book and a rock concert, another will list the consequences of fun drinking sessions with friends, and the third will count the income of your colleagues.

Is he capable of giving compliments?
By the way a man is, you can understand a lot about him. Lush phrases without embarrassment with seductive smiles are easily given out by inveterate womanizers; Blushing embarrassedly, ordinary guys who are not used to seducing the female sex squeeze out something like “how beautiful you are today.” And it happens that a man looks at you in such a way that no words are needed. Eyes that light up say much more. And, unlike their words, they have never deceived a single woman.

How does he spend money?
It's not about the amount of money or the level of the restaurant to which he invited you. It's about the attitude towards money, the ability to spend it at ease, without bothering you with calculations.

What kind of “program” did you come up with?
If he was preparing for a date (thinking through the route, choosing a cafe, a movie, and bringing flowers for you) - this signals that:
- either he really likes you a lot (you will understand this in the process);
- or he is an enthusiast of his business and just a cool guy (which is also not bad).

Perhaps the first date will be completely different from what you had imagined, and your partner will disappoint you, but do not despair. After all, this is not the last time. And one day on your way you will definitely meet only the person destined for you.

Your date has come to an end, and on the way home you're tormenting yourself with speculation about how exactly it went? Are you trying to weigh the pros and cons, to understand what your new boyfriend liked? There are ways to determine if everything is going as it should!

So, 7 main signs that your date went well and your relationship may have a future:

1. Duration of the date

If everything goes as it should, you won't want the meeting to end. Therefore, if a date lasts more than an hour, this is a good reason to consider it successful. If you or your boyfriend endlessly look at the clock, then the date is a failure.

1. Pleasant conversation

If you find it easy to communicate with each other, this is a sure sign of a successful first date. The conversation should be relaxed and natural, and topics for conversation should arise naturally.

1. Light touches

This is a very subtle sign, if the person you came on a date with does not attack you and starts hugging you, this does not mean that the evening is lost. But if he touches your arm, hair, knee, and you both feel comfortable, congratulations!

1. Eye contact

When partners don't like each other, they usually don't make eye contact. And vice versa. So, if you look at each other all the time and make eye contact while talking, everything goes according to script.

1. Watch your body language during a date

If a man is really interested in you, he will blush and be nervous, so you will definitely notice it. In addition, he will find even your flattest jokes funny, and therefore will laugh long and hard when you give him such a reason during a date. Watch your body language: the person casually licks his lips, casts subtle glances at you, is embarrassed, and so on. These are all signs that he is physically attractive to you.

1. The end of a good first date drags on

If a date ends abruptly, without attempts to make a new one and without plans for the next evening, everything is sad. If you both want to stay close a little longer, this is a great sign. You are also on the right track if your partner does not run away, saying as an excuse that he urgently needs to feed the dog, or to get up early in the morning.

1. Future plans

We are not saying that the first date should end with a conversation about the wedding - under no circumstances! However, if you share plans with each other about what you would like to do and try in the future, this is a good sign. You will probably meet again!

As you can see, it's not difficult to determine if a first date is going well. Just be careful! Don't miss the signs that will tell you.

It's not that difficult to fail a first date, and no one is immune from it. A person may be blessed with good looks, have a great sense of humor, be successful in his career and have many other advantages, but this will not protect him from an unsuccessful first date.

Signs that the first date is a failure:

1. Lack of excitement. Complete indifference, both on the part of a woman and on the part of a man, speaks volumes. Even though, for example, a woman has won more than one beauty contest, she will still experience a slight nervous state if she likes a man. When it becomes obvious to one of those meeting that this is the first and last date, then nervousness and excitement will give way to complete indifference.
2. No eye to eye contact. It’s not for nothing that they say that the eyes are the mirror of the soul. You can easily read in the eyes how a person feels about his surroundings. This sign especially shows the attitude of women to what is happening. Many representatives of the fair sex love to flirt, shoot their eyes and use their eyes in every possible way to demonstrate to a man that she is very attracted to him. If a woman on a date only looks at her plate, at the TV screen at the bar, and God knows where else, but not at the man, then this is the first sign that this meeting turned out to be an unsuccessful first date.
3. Reluctance to shorten the distance. If the interlocutor is experienced in dating and is interested in a partner for further meetings, then there can be no exceptions; he will begin to close the distance: he will inadvertently touch the interlocutor’s hand, shake off non-existent specks of dust from his shoulder, move closer to talk, and so on.
4. You can also ruin your first date using your phone. If a girl or guy does not part with her communication device at a meeting, constantly answers calls or calls someone himself, responds to endless SMS or simply looks through a social network, then it’s clear that there will not be a next date.
5. Long awkward pauses. If the conversation doesn’t go well, and one of the partners bends over backwards to start a conversation on any topic, while the other looks with an indifferent gaze and remains silent, then this is another clear evidence of an unsuccessful first date.
6. Denial and silence about points of contact. People are designed in such a way that, given their likings, they want to find any topics that would help them get closer to the person they like. This could be your favorite musical group, movie, hobby, sport, etc. When one of the partners is intensely looking for common topics for conversation and trying to find out mutual interests, while the other remains silent and denies everything, it means there is no interest in continuing the acquaintance.
7. It's easy to ruin a first date by mentioning your ex-lovers. This rule applies not only to the first date, but also to subsequent meetings. There is no point in returning to the past while living in the present. Moreover, there is no need to make comparisons between people by saying it out loud. If a girl or guy comes back talking about their former passions, it means the feelings have not completely subsided and the person is not capable of building new and stable relationships.
8. Refusal to continue. If people like each other, they will try their best to delay the time of separation. After being together for the required couple of hours on the first date, there will be no desire to go about your business. Therefore, the date can continue in a cafe, a walk in the park, visiting a cinema and other places. The main thing in this matter will be that people are together.
9. Other plans. Sometimes on a date, one of the partners, for example a man, finds out that the woman has allocated at most 1-2 hours for their meeting, and then her plans include other entertainment (going to the cinema with her friends, visiting a cafe with colleagues, etc.). Then the outcome will be clear, the woman did not like the man and instead of continuing the date with him, she chooses anything but spending time together. Conversely, if a woman abandons pre-established plans and remains with a man, then the date is not considered a failed event.
10. A very quick goodbye. The moment of goodbye is as important as the date itself. From these minutes you can understand a lot about the prospects for the future: whether they have a place to be or not. No matter how awkward people feel when talking about seemingly nonsense, the moments of farewell should be delayed a little. If a girl’s farewell consists of the words: “That’s it, bye, I’m off,” and at the same time she really quickly turns around and leaves, then the guy probably shouldn’t delude himself about her and wait for a second meeting.
11. It's very easy to ruin a first date by being rude. A man can be attentive and gallant with a girl, but in relation to other people (a waiter in a cafe, a cashier in a cinema, ordinary passers-by, etc.) he can show rudeness and aggression. Often, such behavior will alert the girl and she is unlikely to agree to future meetings.
12. Excessive nervousness. This can apply to many things, for example, a man is very worried about his empty glass and greedily watches other cafe visitors who drink to their heart's content. This situation may lead to thoughts of some kind of dependence on alcohol. The same can be said about telephone addiction, if one of the partners does not let go of the phone all evening. The opposite party will think more than once whether it is worth starting a relationship with a person who is addicted to something.

Will it happen? Shall we analyze? So, let's begin . His behavior during your first date is very important. When you say something, he asks you questions. You unwittingly tell him about your childhood, your family and friends. He loves to give comments, he jokes and watches you carefully. He also talks about himself with pleasure and you don’t even have to ask him for anything.

If everything is completely different, your conversation is tense, and you take long pauses and feel uncomfortable, and he often glances at his watch or looks away all the time, then alas. And if he is in a hurry to an important meeting or urgently needs to go to work, then it is better to forget about him immediately, or, as they say, hope for the best, and still be prepared for the worst. There is another interesting point. You've probably heard something like, "Do you want anything else?" From men. They say this most often towards the end of your meeting. There is another phrase: "Let's stay here and chat for a while, okay?" They can say it in a lot of ways, but what do you think it means? I can assure you this is not the case. The first of them is simply so to speak, to honor the traditions of a polite person and is nothing more than a cliché, expressed, as a rule, indifferently. You, on your part, respond indifferently in turn.

As for the other thing, the situation is more interesting. If a man asks such a question, he is most likely hoping for a positive answer from you, which is a clear indication that he is interested in you and feels good with you, hoping for. If he didn't kiss you after the first or second date, or he just kissed you on the cheek, it doesn't mean he doesn't like you. Quite the opposite, he is serious about you, or maybe he is shy. But you, in turn, don’t be surprised for long. Just kiss him yourself if you want. It's not a problem, is it? He will even thank you for it.

You wonder whether he will call or not. If he didn't do it the next day, there's no reason to be upset. You shouldn't go to the toilet with your phone in your hand and keep it next to you when you sleep, or look at it expectantly all the time. Return to your daily life. If you can't answer the phone when he calls you, he will call you back anyway if he really needs to talk to you.

Mostly men call before they intend to spend with you. It also takes time to think things through, especially if you've made an impression on him.

I will even tell you more, if a man has serious intentions, he will not call you right away. And if you feel like he's really into you and you feel attracted to each other, you can call yourself or (even better) send him an SMS. If he doesn't respond to it within a few days, then it looks like there's no chance for you.

Just because he said, “See you later,” or promised to call you, doesn’t mean it will be the same as he said. He should say something like this when your first date is over. Don't get upset or blame yourself. Nor should you think that he was unable to see who you really were or pay attention to your merits during your first date. He saw what he wanted and he doesn't care about the rest. Do you really need such a person? Don't think. If he tells you “Goodbye!” , and he mentions the approximate date when he would like you to meet next, you can be proud of yourself. I can say that it will be either within the next week after the first meeting or right on the day that he noted.

So, you've already started dating and everything is fine. This is amazing. The further it goes, the more interesting it will be. To be continued…

Sometimes details can lead you to the right thoughts. Remember how the gentleman made the date: did he try to reschedule the meeting, which of you chose the place and date, whether he was late, etc. It is difficult to hide genuine interest; a determined man is unlikely to cancel a meeting several times or dictate the terms of where to have a date.

Did you feel comfortable

Feeling awkward in the first minutes of a date is common. However, if you felt tense throughout the meeting or suffered from long pauses in the conversation, things are bad - most likely there will be no continuation. And if it does, then think about it: would you like to invest in a relationship, breaking through your own (or your partner’s) feeling of discomfort and tension? On the other hand, there are enough examples when lasting sympathy arose between people much later than the first date.

Is it easy for you to find a common language?

You like the same books and movies, work in related fields, or have a similar lifestyle are all good signs. Having common interests and a similar outlook on life brings people closer together. However, we should not forget about the rule of opposites attracting. In this case, the tone of the conversation about differing interests should alert you: if the gentleman was belligerent and argued loudly, proving that he was right, it is hardly worth preparing for a second date.

What topics did you discuss?

Mutual sympathy often pushes us to talk about serious (and often personal) topics. If you were constantly discussing the weather, the past weekend, or your jobs, you shouldn’t have high hopes for your “second time.” The same rule applies to the situation if you or your partner did not part with your smartphone throughout the meeting - this is a good indicator of whether you are interested in your interlocutor (and vice versa).

What was his body language saying?

We unconsciously want to touch those we like. Therefore, if on a date he took every opportunity to touch you - bingo! — a spark definitely ran between you.

However, you shouldn’t consider all this a set of strict rules: what if you and your boyfriend are complete introverts who simply didn’t immediately recognize “their soul mate” in each other? Some clues about whether a man likes you can be found