What a man does not forgive and what a woman will never forgive. “Go away and close the door!” Should you forgive a man if he offended you? What a man cannot forgive

Are you sitting in splendid isolation, not answering calls and texts, thoughtfully sipping cold tea and doubting whether you should forgive him? Well, admit it, after all, thoughts appear in your sweet head that you need to have pride, a man is not worthy of you, and in general, tomorrow you will find yourself a hundred more of them?

My dear, let's be honest: your decision will depend on how seriously your man screwed up. Agree, there is a noticeable difference between “Forgot to pick me up from work” and “He cheated on me.”

• In the first case, everything is solved simply. You pout, play the Snow Queen, he will bring you a huge bouquet, a brand new IPhone or a trip to exotic islands - and magically your resentment will disappear.
• If the reason for the offense is serious, the situation becomes more complicated. Because you can't forgive someone with a snap of your fingers. Even if you’ve listened to your mother’s advice that “Time heals,” had a psychotherapy session in an embrace with a friend, or read a couple of smart books. Because you experience pain, resentment, anger and a whole bunch of negative feelings - and they won’t go away. Even if a man asks for forgiveness 300 times and promises to be white and fluffy.

And she will definitely explode because your feelings are not getting any outlet.

Let's give some examples. The girl says: “I decided to forgive the betrayal and start the relationship from scratch.” A couple of months pass and the man is late at work. He needs to finish an urgent project.

What will the girl do? Quietly watch TV and crunch on chips? Hardly. Colorful images are already appearing in her head of what he could be doing there with the secretary. She will call, write, eat your brain out with a teaspoon and throw tantrums. Do you think this is like “starting over again?”

Or a woman who “forgot everything,” but reminds a man of his sins at every opportunity. “I have forgiven you, I am trying to save my family, but you don’t even want to give up fishing for me” - in my opinion, this is very similar to manipulation and blackmail.

What must a man do to receive forgiveness?

My dear, answer me honestly, have you tried to ask yourself just one question: “What should a man do for me to forgive him?” Because many women cannot give themselves a clear answer. And options like:

• Let him buy me a car.
• Will pay for shopping.
• He will ask for forgiveness on his knees and give 1000 and 1 rose - this is just a beautiful scene from a movie or a good opportunity to fulfill your wishes.

Yes, at this moment you will melt like ice cream, you will be pleased that the man in front of you walks on tiptoe and literally reads all the desires from your subconscious. What's next? The bouquet will wither, the fur coat will go into the closet, but the resentment and anger will remain.

It is very important that you understand: a man will not be able to rid you of this whole range of negative feelings, even if he showers you with flowers. Only you can do this yourself.

Suppose you firmly decided not to forgive the man. Throw him out the door with his suitcases and find someone else, less problematic. And now you enter into a new relationship. With a load of unlived grievances from a former partner. You will look at the new man through the rearview mirror, through the prism of your feelings that still remain inside you.

In fact, he hasn’t even had time to mess up yet, and you’re already expecting some kind of trick from him. Especially if he has the same name, or eye color, or zodiac sign. You will definitely find something to dig into. And you know, with your behavior you provoke a repetition of the situation. And then you will complain that all real men have died out and attracting goats is your karma.

What to do next?

The favorite phrase of many women is: “It’s all his fault.” You know, maybe you're right. But how will this help you? I have always been surprised by women who refuse to work on themselves. “Why should I take a course with Yaroslav? It's the man's fault! Let him crawl to me, apologize, give me money. Otherwise it’s somehow unfair: he offended me, but I have to go to therapy!”

But if you want to transform these emotions so that they do not interfere with reviving old ones or building new relationships with a man, you have a tremendous amount of work to do on yourself.

There are no magic pills! Superman will not arrive to heal your heart with love. Because falling in love will quickly pass, and the same feelings that you hid deeper will rise to the surface.

• If you think that all men are the same and only dream of sticking their nose into someone else's bed, who will you attract? A partner who will hurt you again.
• If the “I am myself” program works 100% in you, and you consider men to be weaklings, who will be attracted to you? A sub-man who will sit comfortably on your neck. Because you won’t take someone worthy with a weak “Come on, prove that you’re not like that.” He doesn’t need to compete and fight for leadership, he needs a normal woman with whom he doesn’t have to fight.

Incredible facts

If you think that cheating is the worst thing that can happen to a couple, then you are wrong.

There are scary things men do in relationships that...capable of destroying everything. And we are not talking about betrayal at all.

These actions are worse than betrayal, and a woman simply does not have the right to forgive her man for them.

What can't a man be forgiven for?

1. When he texts or chats with other women behind your back, then denies his guilt when you expose him.

This behavior borders on deception and betrayal. Flirting is a mild degree of betrayal.

And if your man gives in to provocations by responding to messages from other girls, this can slowly destroy the “perfect” relationship.

If a man is in a serious relationship, there is no need to text and flirt with other women behind your back.

2. When he doesn't respect your job/career/hobby

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If your man makes snarky jokes or nasty comments, implying that your job or hobbies don't really matter, this is a bad sign.

By not respecting your interests, he is also disrespectful towards you. He just doesn't take you seriously.

This also means that your man sees you as someone who is unable to take care of himself, and he will definitely not be someone you can talk to about your problems and discuss your troubles.

3. When he blames you for his defeats and failures

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He is an adult, and no one is to blame for his failures except himself.

If a man lashes out at you and blames you for his mistakes, this means that he is an absolutely immature person and shifts responsibility for his actions to someone else.

Such things cannot be forgiven.

4. When he is disrespectful and rude to your family members or your boyfriends

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He obviously never learned one of the most important lessons in life, which is: the way to the heart of your loved one is through her family!

This means you need to learn to get along with your beloved’s family.

If he didn't, you will feel tension throughout your life together. Joint dinners, going to restaurants and other events will turn into sheer torture.

5. When he shares your candid photos with friends or acquaintances

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A person does not respect you and does not value you if he allows himself to do this. Your intimate photos are something that should remain only between the two of you.

And if it was his privilege to see you naked in photographs, this does not mean that someone else can see you in this form.

What cannot be forgiven

6. When he pushes you to do things you don't like.

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He does not see and does not understand the very line and border that should not be crossed.

If he doesn't respect your wishes, forcing you to do something you don't want, run away from such a man.

7. When he takes advantage of you

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You are two equal members in your relationship.

Remember: you are not his personal ATM, you are not his driver and you should not babysit him like a child.

He is an adult and is quite capable of dealing with his own problems. Supporting a loved one is one thing. But when you feel that he is openly using you for his own selfish purposes, run away from him.

What's worse than cheating?

8. When he hurts you, another person, a defenseless animal, a child, etc.

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If a man raises his hand against you, or hurts someone else, this is a serious reason to sound the alarm.

If you saw that he kicked a defenseless animal on the street or threw a stone at it for no reason, this means that he is a cruel person. Thus, he takes it out on the weak, on those who cannot answer him.

A man who lacks remorse is not worth your love. Get away from this before it’s too late, or even better, avoid a relationship with such a person in the first place.

Remember, if a person is capable of inflicting physical pain on the weak, at any moment he can also take it out on you or your children.

9. When he abuses alcohol or other illegal drugs

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If a person has problems with alcohol or substance abuse, and he does not intend to fight this addiction, stop trying to help him.

Remember: you are not Mother Teresa, and if he himself does not understand that he is ruining his life, you do not have to do the same with yours.

10. When he lies to you even about little things

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Men usually lie to avoid punishment. However, if he lies to you often and even about minor details and without reason, then what can we say about more serious things?

11. When he doesn't respect your personal space

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If a man monitors your calls and digs into the history of correspondence with his girlfriends, this means that he does not trust you.

Sometimes mistrust goes beyond what is permitted and takes on a paranoid character.

Unforgivable

12. When he yells at you and publicly humiliates you

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You should never humiliate each other, even in private. And if he humiliates you in advance, raises his voice or makes caustic and unpleasant jokes in your direction, then this is doubly unpleasant.

Do not forgive your partner for insulting or humiliating himself, either in private or in public.

13. When he compares you to his exes

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A woman should not care how many girls her man had before her. This all happened before, period!

But if your man constantly compares you to his exes, constantly reminding you of them, this is a huge disrespect on his part.

No woman will enjoy constant competition, even if we are talking about former lovers.

So there is no need for him to compare you to any of his exes.

14. When he doesn't pay attention to your problems or underestimates the things that bother you.

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If he is not able to help you solve the problems that concern you, or reassure you with advice, take care of you, then he will not be able to become that reliable support in life that all women so dream of.

And when difficult times come, you will have to deal with the problems on your own.

15. When you are not particularly important to him

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When a person loves someone, it is normal to put the person they love above everything and everyone.

You should be your partner's priority. If you are in the tenth role with him, after hobbies, friends and partying, this means that he does not value you.

You shouldn’t be jealous of a man’s work, but if it’s not about making money, but about less significant things, this is a reason to think about whether you need a relationship in which you are not valued.

16. When he constantly brings up your past

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If there were negative moments in your past, and you shared them with your lover, this is not at all a reason to remind you of this at every convenient and inconvenient occasion.

It doesn’t look good on a man if he reminds you in a negative way of moments that you would like to forget.

In this way, he hurts you and makes you unpleasant, which means he simply does not respect your feelings and desires.

You need to be able to concentrate only on the present and on the future together. Leave the past in the past, and if something happened before, it happened before you started dating.

17. When he doesn't support you

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Being next to a man, a woman should feel support and support.

If you feel bad, he shouldn't make you feel worse. He should be a reliable and stone wall, and not someone who will finish off morally.

If your man makes you feel inferior, he may be manipulating you. This makes it easier for him to control the situation and subjugate you to himself.

18. When he doesn't show you that he loves and appreciates you.

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If your man doesn't show you that he loves and appreciates you, then why are you even together?

He may not express his love in words, but his actions should speak for themselves. If this does not happen, then there is no point in wasting time on a person who does not deserve it.

Unfortunately, once the honeymoon period or honeymoon phase comes to an end, the newlyweds become just two ordinary people who face a number of problems.

These ups and downs need to be overcome together.

It is important to be able to find a compromise and forgive each other. But there are things that, indeed, cannot and should not be forgiven by a man.

When we love we are ready forgive a loved one has a lot, but not everything! After all, loving does not mean forgiving everything, loving does not mean humiliating yourself, loving does not mean bending... In order not only to love yourself, but also to be loved, first of all, you must be able to value yourself. Unfortunately, not all women understand this. Many people forgive their beloved even what the man himself could never forgive her. Every time they hear excuses from their man like: “I’m sorry, I made a mistake, I relaxed, I was drunk, I’ll correct myself, this won’t happen again,” they give him another chance and continue to live together. Women's nature is this: even though she has heard such excuses for the hundredth time and deep down does not believe a single word a man says, a woman's maternal instinct kicks in at such moments. She is ready to believe in all sorts of fables that a man makes up, just so that her loved one and children don’t feel bad, and their relationship doesn’t come to an end.

Another thing men, it is quite difficult for them to forgive the betrayal of their beloved woman. Men, unlike women, do not believe in excuses. They simply accept the fact that the woman cheated on him, which means she found someone better than him. A real man always strives to become a winner; he tries to take leadership positions in his family. And if a woman cheated on him, then he no longer feels like the first. A man will never be able to accept that his woman has another, stronger and more important than him. Forgiving a woman’s betrayal for a man is the same as agreeing that he is weaker and worse than others. He will not live with a woman who deeply hurt his male pride. Therefore, most often, men, upon learning about their wife’s infidelity, break up with her. A few remain close, but they always feel wounded and do not calm down until they take revenge on the woman for her hurt pride.

In this case relationship between a man and a woman become unbearable, they consist of a series of constant accusations and insults. This is how one famous businessman describes his feelings after receiving evidence of his young wife’s infidelity: “I suffered greatly and cried bitterly, drank and ate a lot out of great shock. A week later I gave her a large bouquet of white roses, but I could forgive her in my heart.” "I couldn't. To love - I loved, but to forgive - excuse me. May God forgive her." Now he has already divorced his young wife and lives with another, who may help him forget the betrayal of the one he loved very much.

Except betrayal, there are words that can cause a deterioration in the relationship between a man and a woman. They hurt the soul and hurt men's pride. A man, having heard them, may not show that he is offended by you, but believe me, he will never forget these words and will not be able to forgive you for them. Here's what you should never say to a man whose love you value:

1. That someone earns more than him. Don't blame your loved one for not earning enough money. Unless, of course, he is a gigolo and refuses to work at all. For a man, the topic of his salary is the most painful. He himself knows well that he needs to climb the career ladder or find another well-paid job. But so far he hasn’t succeeded, and your reproaches will only worsen the situation. After them, he will lose self-confidence and generally stop striving for anything.

2. About how your ex-boyfriend was better at something than him. Every man wants to be one and only for his woman. By comparing him to other men who have courted you before, you are trying to dissuade him from this. Having heard the words from your lips: “Remember, my classmate Petya was courting me. So today I found out that he had already become a director. He was a smart guy, it was immediately obvious that he would achieve success,” - maybe your husband will not show it, that your words hurt him greatly. But believe me, in 20 years he will be able to repeat them to you word for word. Men do not forget or forgive such words, even to the woman they love.

3. Unfair accusations about his relatives. During a quarrel or conversation, you should not speak insultingly about a man’s close relatives, especially his parents, brother or sister. He himself knows that they are not ideal, so your reproaches will not be news to him. But this is his mother, father, brother or sister, and he is a man who will not let them offend him. Any unfair accusations about his relatives cause anger and resentment in a man, which he is unlikely to be able to forget.

4. About the fact that you don’t need him without money. Consumerism and cold calculations towards a man are the most common problem among modern women. A selfish woman who is not interested in anything other than money repels all men without exception. Do not use expressions during a conversation: “I wouldn’t date you if you didn’t have an apartment,” “I don’t need you without a car and an apartment,” “You don’t have to come to me unless you buy me a fur coat,” and things like that quickly kill a man’s love. No one can forgive a woman for such words, which is why men leave selfish people for those who are independent and know how to earn money themselves.

Apply offend a man easy and simple, but sometimes it is impossible to earn forgiveness. To avoid having to regret your actions, treat the man you love the way you want him to treat you. Think a hundred times before you make a mistake or say a word that will hurt a man’s pride.

It would seem that if two loving hearts are destined to be together, then nothing will interfere with them. They will overcome any difficulty and forgive each other everything. But as reality shows, this is not always the case.

There are things that neither a woman nor a man can ever forgive each other. It may seem that the conflict has been resolved and its parties have forgotten about it, but one side is always gnawed by doubts and resentment. The whole point is that she could not forgive what was done and forget the offense.

It's no secret that men and women are built differently. They have different thoughts and reactions to the same event. This means that what cannot be forgiven a man is sometimes forgiven a woman. You need to understand this in detail so as not to make mistakes for which you would have to ask for forgiveness.

What men don't forgive women

Men are quite patient creatures. They are less emotional, but more categorical. “Lisping” and “musing” are not typical for them. If something doesn’t suit them, then for the most part, they cut from the shoulder. Of course, everything is individual, and what one man does not forgive, another can forgive. But for the most part the situation looks like this. So, what do men not forgive their women?

1. Treason

The vast majority of the male population is not inclined to forgive infidelity to their girlfriends and wives. And the point here is not at all a matter of jealousy, but of pride, which was dealt a crushing blow. He, the best, successful, charming and attractive, was compared with someone else. This simply cannot be!

Treason also has a scale: from emotional betrayal, before physical. For some, just one comparison with the ECS is enough, and that’s it - chips fly. Many women do not let up and name their first child after their ex, which also deals an unimaginable blow to a man’s self-esteem.

For a man, female infidelity is not just a betrayal, but an insult. He immediately begins to doubt his uniqueness and, in order to protect himself from this in the future, breaks off the relationship once and for all. Men do not forgive physical betrayal, no matter how much apologies a woman makes and no matter how she swears fidelity. Most often, the thought that “I changed once, will change twice” does not leave the consciousness. And such a woman ceases to exist forever for a man, even if it is very painful.

2. Men never forgive insults directed at them.

A well-known proverb says “my tongue is my enemy.” And this largely applies to women. In a fit of quarrel or resentment, she is inclined to express everything she thinks. Very often she will regret it and apologize, but, unfortunately, “the word is not a sparrow...”.

Men rarely pay attention to offensive words addressed to them. Well, they called them scoundrels or scoundrels. Big deal. In a few hours, this quarrel will be forgotten, and the offensive words will be erased from memory.

But it’s another matter when his pride is hurt, when in a fit of anger a friend called him a failure in life, an unmanly man and a man incapable of anything.

Men are especially offended by comments addressed to them as an unsatisfactory sexual partner. Here she will never beg forgiveness. These words will not be forgotten, and even if a man pretends to forgive, but in fact, he will remember them all his life.

3. Men never forgive being ignored in sex.

It gives any man joy and pleasure when his partner considers him the best in sex. But when it turns into ordinary marital duty, then troubles are possible.

If a woman avoids intimacy, citing being busy, tired or migraine, this is a reason for a man to think about it. Firstly, he is struck by the thought that he no longer satisfies his partner as before, and secondly, that perhaps she has taken a lover.

These thoughts haunt him, he may even seek self-affirmation with another woman. Well, this is betrayal, which women do not forgive, breakup and divorce.

4. Men have a hard time forgiving a woman’s superiority.

A man is used to being the head of the family, a breadwinner, a conqueror. This has been the case for many centuries. He believes in it and thinks it's right. But then a woman appears in his life who takes on the role of head. Only some representatives of the stronger sex will accept this.

Those who are unsure of themselves, or as they are also called “mama’s boys,” will be absolutely indifferent to this state of affairs. For them, the leadership of women will even be a joy. They will shift the solution of all problems and concerns onto her. But be prepared that they will also blame their partner for all failures.

But in most cases, the dominance of a woman is an unacceptable situation in the family for a man. He will never come to terms with this and will not forgive. He simply will not allow a woman to start commanding and directing him. Here you don't even have to try.

5. Physical superiority of a woman

It is difficult for a man to accept and forgive not only the moral, but also the physical superiority of a woman. If she is stronger, more physically developed, then he is unlikely to like it. And this again hurts his male pride.

Here many will argue that nothing prevents a man from developing physically, and not growing a beer belly. This is true. But if a girl always emphasizes his physical shortcomings and constantly pesters him about joining the gym, this will have its consequences.

A wise woman can always find an approach to this and make sure that the man himself understands and decides to take care of his physical form.

6. Great love for money and prudence

The biggest mistake a man’s chosen one makes is to tell him that without a car and an apartment, he would be nothing and she would not pay attention to him. Hearing that the woman he loved was attracted only by his well-being, and not by his spiritual qualities, is very painful.

The reaction to such words can be either strong resentment or leaving for another woman who does not care so much about his money.

7. A man does not forgive insults towards his relatives

As you know, relatives are not chosen. Even if they are not impeccable, they are relatives, they are family. He can think whatever he wants about them and say the same, but he will take critical remarks from a woman as a personal insult.

During a quarrel, a woman should not think about the relatives of her chosen one. Whatever they are, he will certainly defend their good name. Especially, you should not speak about loved ones offensively or mockingly. He will never forget these words.

Yes, sometimes relatives end up with those other cadres, and most likely your man understands this, but in the heat of your anger and the peak of his patience, he can simply choose them over you. Yes, perhaps you are luckier and your relatives are more cultured and reserved, or even better, they live far away. But imagine if they lived nearby, perhaps they would also infuriate your man. Therefore, every time you again want to criticize the uncle of your chosen one, think for a second: do you need it?! After all, you have your own relationship and you love each other not for relatives, but for the qualities that your chosen one has.

8. Men don't forgive barbs.

If a man once showed weakness or his physical inadequacy, and the woman cannot calm down and constantly reminds him of this, and even tells him to everyone. This is a punch in the gut!

A man cannot endure ridicule directed at himself from a seemingly loving woman.

9. Jealousy

Excessive and/or unreasonable jealousy can bring any man to the boiling point. If a woman does not give him access, controls him every second, calling him every half hour when he is with friends in the bathhouse or at work, and if he does not answer the phone, then they call your friends - this could be two hundred of any man. Remember moderation, no need to overdo it.

What else do men not forgive women?

The list of “terrible sins” that under no circumstances will be forgiven by men includes the following:

• feminine stupidity . The statement that men love stupid beauties has long lost its relevance. They love smart beauties. Remember this;
• passion for strong alcoholic drinks . Few people will like a woman who can barely stand on her feet and has a terrible smell of drunk alcohol, especially if this is a fairly common occurrence;
• woman's request to stop communicating with friends . Male friendship is something that no woman, even the most beloved, can influence. The ban on communicating with friends is regarded as an infringement on personal freedom;
• constant reproaches regarding any area of ​​life , be it salary, position, skills and abilities;
• demanding an apology for any reason ;
• passion for TV series . Any man wants to be given attention. He will not be able to forgive if a woman exchanges precious minutes with him for watching her series;

It is believed that a woman is able to forgive an insult, but will never forget it. The man, on the contrary, will not forgive her. After all, to forgive, according to many men, is to show one’s weakness. This is unnatural for them.

What will a man forgive the woman he loves?

It seems that there are no situations that a man is ready to forgive. In fact, a loving man is ready to close his eyes and forgive a lot. Why do men forgive women? Of course, the main reason is love. Loving people are ready to forgive each other a lot.

• A wise and loving man will never leave his chosen one because of minor shortcomings, for example, if she does not know how to cook. Although, if there are a lot of these shortcomings, then...
• A man will turn a blind eye to excessive knowledge about your girlfriends’ personal lives. He will understand that changing a woman is simply unrealistic. At the genetic level, they have a need to share information and experiences. But still, a woman should remember that not all details of family life should become public knowledge. There must be some secret for the two.
• And the main thing is that a man is ready to forgive the woman he loves, her passion for shopping and purchases. Even if she makes purchases that are not always necessary and spends large sums on it, the man will tolerate it. Here it is important for her not to cross the line and spend the entire family budget.

What a man cannot forgive

There is an opinion that a woman is ready to make any sacrifices in order to preserve her family and is ready to forgive a man constantly. Something a lot of guys use. It was like that before. But times are changing. Gone are the days when people had a death grip on a man. Nowadays, more and more often we meet self-sufficient women who feel quite confident professionally and stand confidently on their feet. For whom the main thing in life is to find an honest man who will love only her and her children all her life.

But there is that line, the violation of which a woman still cannot forgive a man, even if she loves him very much.

1. Treason

This is number one in any case. Like a man, a woman also has a hard time getting used to the idea that a man easily accepted the fact of replacing his partner. Love, in an intimate sense, for many women is a sacrament between her and her lover, it is complete trust and openness. And when a third one invades this fairy-tale world, it ceases to be so valuable and unshakable. This means it can no longer satisfy as before on an emotional level.

Only a few women around the world forgive their men for this sin. Most often due to the preservation of the family.

Treason- this is a “point of no return” for both women and men. You can try to forgive, for your own sake, for the sake of your children, to step on the throat of your pride, but... It will be the same as picking up a broken vase. Beautiful? It seems intact, but something is not quite right. And the cracks remind of what happened.

Advice cannot help in this situation. Some say that you need to quit, forget and move on with your life. And most likely, this is the right decision, but it is very difficult to make.

Why do women forgive infidelity? First of all, they are afraid of being left alone without support. There is also some uncertainty about the future and one’s strengths.

2. Dangerous addictions

The woman believes that the bad habits of his beloved are a thing of the past. But, sad as it is, former drug addicts, alcoholics and gambling addicts do not exist. A harmful passion replaces love for them. It is a great misconception of the chosen one to think that her man will change his habits for her sake. Such cases are rare.

A man will not give up his dangerous addiction, even if he is persuaded and asked. All addictions are deep in the subconscious and to eradicate them, drastic measures (psychologists or doctors) or new deep meanings of life are needed. He will promise hundreds of times that he will stop this, but at the same time he will return home drunk again. The next morning he will ask for forgiveness and make promises, but is it worth believing this for the hundredth time? As a rule, women answer - no! But there are others, “patients”. Most often, these are women who are not confident in themselves, who believe that they will not find anyone better for themselves anyway, “and who needs me at 35 years old.”

3. Women do not forgive emotional dullness.

Support in difficult times is very important for every woman; it is important to have a loving person nearby. Women, in principle, tend to experience a huge number of emotions. And when you keep everything inside for a long time, peaks come and spill out. At such moments, you want to cry, speak out and hear words of support and sympathy in response. It’s not always possible to call a friend or mother, and of course all hope lies with the man you love. But, as luck would have it, he is not around or he does not react in any way, considering your emotions unfounded and “inflated.”

Ardent and emotional women simply cannot now take such a callous attitude towards their emotions and therefore prefer to break up with a man. In this situation we are talking about a mismatch of temperaments.

4. Women do not forgive constant complaints about life.

Lamentation is the lot of women, but not men. A man must be strong and resistant to all blows of fate. Every woman wants to feel protected and confident that she can always rely on her man. Can a normal woman live with a guy who always complains about everyone and everything? He has everyone to blame, including his chosen one, for the fact that something did not work out for him, that the position did not go to him and that the salary is not high enough.

Not every woman can bear constant complaints. And it’s impossible to understand and forgive when you are accused of all mortal sins.

5. Constant promises

Women like it when men keep their promises. There is a significant difference between reminders for a specific action, such as hanging a lamp in the hallway, and empty promises. It’s normal to remind a man about something several times, but when promises take on disaster proportions and are not fulfilled, then this is a reason to think about it.

The man promised to re-tile the bathroom and didn’t fulfill it, promised that he would change his behavior and not be so callous to her emotions and didn’t fulfill it, promised to stop drinking or not come back so late again and didn’t fulfill it, promised to take up raising children - and again didn’t fulfill it promised. When the sum of these components reaches the limiting point, the woman simply cannot stand it and takes drastic measures.

Living with a partner who only “feeds” you with promises means living in constant dissonance: you seem to believe that he will improve, but this does not happen. All this leads to the development of personal and interpersonal conflicts.

6. Unfulfilled ambitions

It is very difficult for women whose man considers himself an unrecognized genius. With this he constantly justifies his laziness and inactivity. A woman can work three jobs to feed her family, while he will lie on the couch and wait for the muse to visit him.

Here, of course, it’s a purely individual matter, to forgive and move on or to let the artist go free. But, as a rule, a genius does not consider it necessary to change anything and continues to wait for his inspiration.

7. Excessive pride

When a man sees no one but himself, it repels a woman. Next to such a man, a woman feels in a secondary role.

A man’s excessive narcissism about his personality, his qualities and achievements makes a woman think about the quality of her relationship with such a male.

8. Greed

It is a well-known fact that women have more things than men. This is connected both with physiological characteristics and with the roles performed by a woman in the family: mother, housewife, wife, friend, etc.

Many women relax when they go shopping. But there are some men who are not ready to fork out money for women’s whims. Giving a useless gift to your beloved, much less buying her an extra handbag, is not about them. They will count every ruble spent by a woman and ask her to account for all purchases. Which, undoubtedly, at a certain time will make a girl think about whether she even needs such an accountant in a relationship.

An interesting video that will complement the above points. Mistakes of men in relationships.

Relationships are what underpins a family. How you learn to build relationships before marriage will directly determine the style of your married couple. God created us all equal, we are all born the same, which means we define and create ourselves, working on ourselves, our complexes, fears, etc. We create our own personality. For some it’s easier to be in a role. And someone prefers to be a director and actively take part in building themselves, their environment, their life.

We enter into relationships with already established life positions. Some are ready to forgive all the “deeds” of their partner, while others will never put up with anything that does not correspond to their position in life.

In the first case, the relationship is doomed: eternal torment, eternal problems, conflicts, etc.

In the second case, a person knows exactly what kind of partner he is looking for, with what qualities and life attitudes. And such a person will definitely find it. And this couple will be happier.

So, what cannot be forgiven in a relationship, so as not to be in the role of a victim.

1. You can’t forgive aggression

Aggression both towards your partner and towards children. Whatever happens in a man’s life, he has no right to take out his anger on a woman, much less raise his hand against her or his children. Sometimes it is not only about physical violence, but also moral. Sometimes harsh words can hurt more. This behavior destroys even the best relationships that have existed for a long time. Although you can really call them good. Aggression should not be forgiven, under any pretext.

You cannot prohibit your partner from communicating with friends or doing what you love in your free time. Often, in a personal way, he splashes out the negativity that has accumulated in him. Otherwise, everything may affect you.

2. Dark past

Everyone, without exception, has some secrets related to their past. For some, this is a long-passed stage to which they do not return and it is better not to stir them up. But there are points that a partner should know about before starting a relationship. After all, sooner or later some facts of the dark past will become known. It is impossible to hide a criminal past or five illegitimate children.

If you honestly admit what you did in the past, then a truly loving person can understand and forgive what he thinks are minor sins. And it’s better to tell him about this on the shore in order to understand how small they are for him, can he live with this information about you? But if you try to hide a dark past, your partner will regard this as a lie and betrayal. After all, to find out that the husband has several more children and the common child will be 5th in line for inheritance. This is sometimes difficult to accept and forgive.

3. Lack of communication with children from previous relationships

Before starting a new relationship, it is important to find out what kind of relationship your partner had before you. After all, based on previous experience, you can build harmonious relationships.

The fact that a man already in adulthood did not have a relationship or children is alarming. Usually, by the age of 40, men manage to get married and have at least one child.

And if a woman has severed all contact with her children from her first marriage and left them to be raised by their father, then this is a clear reason to think about what kind of relationship you will have.

It is important to find out all the circumstances of the current situation with children from the first marriage. If a man regularly sees his first-born, helps financially and morally, then these are signs of a good father. But if he is not at all interested in the life of his own child and saw him for the last time several years ago, and in the photo “VKontakte”, then you need to think about it.

Every woman, first of all, has a developed maternal instinct. She will not forgive a man for such an attitude towards his own child. She is able to love her husband’s child from a previous relationship, but she cannot forgive his lack of love.

What a man can be forgiven for are small mistakes. They are forgotten literally within a few hours. But a woman’s patience is not endless, just like men. You need to be able to hear each other, respect and share experiences. This is the key to a strong and long-lasting relationship.

The ability to forgive is a manifestation of a strong spirit. Better think again before you say anything. After all, relationships are built brick by brick, and how you lick the next brick will depend on how the whole structure turns out.

And finally, the reasoning of psychologists about male and female infidelity. Myths and reality.

Can a man forgive? Psychologists with thick stacks of tests answer positively, folk wisdom says the opposite. But there are also romantics, according to whom a man filled with love is ready to endure any tests offered by an inventive lady of his heart. How are things really going? Is there something that men never forgive women, or is it possible to test the patience of the stronger sex endlessly with a certain approach?

Why is it harder for men to forgive?

The answer lies in the paradoxical structure of male memory. The man evaluates all the misdeeds of those around him according to his internal scale of acceptability and enters them into an imaginary diary, while pretending that nothing terrible happened. When those around him are almost sure that he has reconciled or forgiven, the space for notes suddenly runs out and the man puts an end to the relationship. At such a moment, it may seem that some mere trifle, like an inappropriately spoken word or a sidelong glance, led to the breakup - but who can know for sure how many records of misconduct have already been made before this?

How a man reacts to insult

1. He forgives the culprit, draws certain conclusions and forgets about the offense - provided that it is not repeated. This is only possible if the troublemaker sincerely repents and asks for forgiveness.
2. He doesn't forgive, but under the pressure of circumstances puts a good face on a bad game. This option is the most difficult: for fear of losing family, children, work or the respect of others, resentment is hidden deep inside for a certain time - and the longer negative feelings are suppressed, the more negative energy accumulates.
3. It's as if he forgives but I don’t intend to continue the relationship. Such forgiveness without forgiveness is generally not typical for men, since it represents a pronounced cognitive dissonance: if the culprit is forgiven, why break up?
4. He can't forgive and leaves for this reason. This happens when that very last point is reached, but the victim will remember for a long time the unavenged insult and the unspoken last word.

Fortunately, for women in relationships, there are not many critical mistakes that lead to an immediate breakup. For example, a man in love, even if he expresses dissatisfaction, is not too offended by:

• minor shortcomings such as lack of culinary talent and passion for order, peculiar taste in clothing or manner of communication;
• excessive communication of the lady with her friends, their awareness of some intimate details of life together;
• a woman’s passion for communication, constant conversations on the phone or correspondence;
• shopping and spontaneous purchases - provided that they do not cause irreparable damage to the family budget.

Test of strength

Everything would be fine if it weren’t for the subconscious desire characteristic of the weaker sex to constantly test feelings for strength, look for the boundaries of what is permissible and test a man’s patience. Science considers this a kind of test of dominance: a woman is well aware of what provokes her partner’s dissatisfaction, but in this simple way she checks whether the chosen one has lost the status of a leader, whether he has lost interest in her, whether it’s time to look for a replacement for him?
The danger lies in the fact that each man has his own, individual boundary. A woman, having become a little accustomed to relationships with the stronger sex, can draw erroneous conclusions and assume that she already knows, which men do not forgive, that all partners have equal strength and are ready to endure approximately the same psychological pressure. Therefore, at some point, the boundary of what is permissible is crossed easily and imperceptibly, and the reaction that follows does not bring pleasure to anyone.

16 main women's mistakes

So, men are ready to close their eyes to many things. However, will forgiveness follow this, or will they shake off the dust from the imaginary diary and make another entry in it, thereby bringing the natural end closer? Below we list the main women's mistakes and blunders, for which the chances of remaining unforgiven are very high.

1. Public criticism

The thing is extremely fragile. Public criticism, ridicule or discussion of shortcomings in front of strangers deal a significant blow to him, especially when it comes to masculinity or intellectual abilities. Men react no less painfully when a woman openly takes the opposite side in an argument or conflict with others. For the stronger sex, which is in eternal confrontation with the outside world, this is akin to betrayal, which men forget, but do not forgive.

2. Reproaches and accusations of insolvency

Daily utterance of complaints, constant dissatisfaction or accusations of incompetence do not have an immediate effect, but they destroy the foundation of the relationship stone by stone. Unfortunately, women regularly try to educate their partner to change his actions and correct his behavior. In such an environment, representatives of the stronger sex lose self-confidence, become passive and give up any ambitions. It is logical that the sincerity of the feelings of a woman who allows herself such behavior is also called into question: men run away from such relationships at the first opportunity.

Any man, deep down in his soul, wants to believe that he is the best sexual partner in the world, and a woman chose him for this reason. However, this faith is even more fragile than a man’s pride - a carelessly spoken word or deliberate criticism of his masculine strength not only instantly and completely repels a man, but can also lead to serious dysfunction of a psychological nature. Humiliation of male dignity is something that a man will never forgive a woman, since the blow turns out to be so deep and painful that it is useless to even ask for leniency.

4. Denial of intimacy

There are thousands of reasons why women refuse their partners: upbringing, differences in temperaments, blackmail and even banal everyday fatigue play a role here. In addition, a woman sometimes declares her attitude towards intimacy as a marital duty, for the fulfillment of which it is absolutely not necessary to feel any desire. However, the conclusions are always clear: the man is convinced that he is not able to give a woman pleasure, that he no longer suits her as a lover. Unfortunately for relationships, replacements are sometimes found very quickly.

5. Comparison with others

Unfavorable comparisons with other people are much more difficult for men than for women, especially when it comes to ex-partners. A man subconsciously wants to be for his lady not only the only one, but also the smartest, the strongest and the most successful. Of course, he understands that he is very far from ideal, but he prefers not to hear about it, especially from the lips of the woman he loves. If the intimate side of the relationship is compared, the reaction intensifies many times over, and the consequences become unpredictable.

6. Commercialism

Despite the universal cult of money and wealth, the stronger sex is extremely cautious about any manifestations of a woman’s material interest in a relationship - these are things that men cannot turn a blind eye to. If a woman shows that her interest is caused by the wealth of the applicant, the presence of the attributes of a wealthy person, that her priority is to receive various types of benefits, then not only love, but also any sympathy on the part of the man will immediately disappear. In addition, a man who has consciously “bought” a woman’s company will have a corresponding attitude towards the “purchase”.

7. Jealousy and suspicion

Uncontrollable and unreasonable is a good way to create constant tension in the family. Men generally do not like baseless accusations and attacks on personal freedom. If they are also supported by round-the-clock monitoring, secret checking of the computer, examination of the phone, the contents of pockets and second-by-second checks of the daily schedule with control interrogations, the end of such a relationship is near. Some ladies, playing scouts, even engage in deliberate provocations, create fake accounts on social networks and persuade their friends to give a man a “test of fidelity.”

8. Manipulation and pressure

According to the point of view imposed by modern media resources, a woman is intellectually and spiritually a more highly developed being than a man. Some ladies perceive this as a guide to action and try to control their partner with the help of primitive manipulations - they develop a guilt complex in him, put him in front of difficult choices, force him to apologize in any situation, and feel inferior as the source of all troubles and misfortunes. Wanting to solely own a man, a woman can force him to give up hobbies, interests, hobbies and even friendships with old comrades.

9. Insulting his relatives

Men like to identify themselves with different social groups. They perceive their relatives in much the same way - as a single family, identifying themselves as its member. Therefore, any attacks and ridicule against a second cousin by a man will be perceived by the man as a personal insult. Of course, relatives are not chosen, and sometimes quite tense situations can arise between them, about which the man speaks unflatteringly. However, if he himself, for example, considers criticism of his own parents acceptable, then he never grants such a right to a woman.

10. Neglect of children

It just so happens that in our society it is mainly women who raise children. However, despite the supposedly indifferent attitude of fathers towards their own descendants, a man invariably recognizes himself as the head and protector of the family, trusting a woman with the most valuable thing he has. In any truly dangerous situation, he will rush to save the child without hesitation - but can a man forgive a woman if she herself becomes the source of this danger? There are often situations when a baby suffers due to the inattention, irresponsibility or lack of foresight of the mother - what man can calmly look at this?

11. Stupidity and narrow-mindedness

The myth that men prefer stupid women has long been debunked. The average confident representative of the stronger sex will prefer a wise and far-sighted life partner. They don’t like stupid and narrow-minded people, although they do not hesitate to use them - as long as they have enough patience to endure the inappropriate actions of a narrow-minded person. Everything becomes much worse if a man who has lost his vigilance finds himself connected to such a lady with a family, children and a mortgage - feeling cheated, he sometimes begins to take revenge, causing trouble for himself and those around him.

12. Lack of ability to forgive

A man prefers to believe that a woman is completely devoted to him and is ready to forgive any mistakes or failures. However, as we know, women do not forget insults - therefore, regularly reminding a man about his moments of weakness at every opportunity is used as an argument for discussion. A man disoriented by such behavior, confident that he has long been forgiven, does not understand what is happening and soon begins to see in the woman not a partner, but an adversary.

13. Neglect and superiority

A normal man will always strive to become the head of the family, regardless of his career success and social status. By questioning his authority, neglecting his opinion, a woman makes a man doubt his merits and abilities. The situation worsens if a woman's attempt to take a dominant role is ostentatiously justified by her higher salary, successful career growth, or physical indicators. Only a few, insecure individuals are able to calmly perceive a constant reminder of female superiority.

14. Betrayal

Betrayal should not be equated with treason, although it often accompanies it. By accidentally or consciously discussing family secrets with strangers (with the same lover, for example), ridiculing a man’s dreams, hopes or hobbies in conversations with other people, a woman thereby shows that she does not value the trust placed in her or the relationship in general. There is no doubt whether men forgive a woman’s betrayal: any of them instantly moves away, withdraws into himself or simply leaves, since without trusting communication and mutual understanding, further coexistence makes no sense.

15. Lies and duplicity

A lie also entails a loss of trust, regardless of its scale: a man naturally assumes that by regularly deceiving him in small things, a woman is also capable of a big lie associated with infidelity or betrayal. The representative of the stronger sex is also wary of dual behavior: having discovered that a lady is telling him one thing to his face and something completely different behind his back, a man will not even try to establish close relationships, since these involve a confidential exchange of thoughts, dreams and experiences.

16. Treason

It would be hard to find a more controversial and relationship-damaging mistake. On the one hand, studies by British scientists have shown that 92% of respondents are ready to forgive infidelity, and on the other hand, we are talking about European men with suppressed self-identification and an artificially reduced level of masculinity. Domestic representatives of the stronger sex react to betrayal much more strongly.

It should be noted that the concept of betrayal is individual for everyone. For some it is enough, and others are ready to forgive “accidental” physical betrayal, but do not accept mental betrayal. In any case, a man’s desire to be the best and the only one in the eyes of his companion suddenly collides with the realization that the woman has found someone better. Realizing that the existing relationship has absolutely no meaning for her, the wounded representative of the stronger sex, even if he is able to come to terms with this fact under the pressure of circumstances, will never return to his former openness and trust.

Love forgives everything

The stereotype about the endless generosity and patience of a man in love is quite dangerous, since a woman convinced of its truth may think that she is allowed everything in a relationship. Undoubtedly, in the initial stages a man is ready to endure any test, but who can say that a few years later in a similar situation he will not take out his diary and re-read the entries made long ago?
On the other hand, the situation is not at all so fatal: normal men tend to forgive in response to a sincere and conscious request, and the list of truly deadly sins is not so long. It is enough to avoid what men never forgive women - and two lovers can always cope with the rest.