A man wants to return 2 months after breaking up. Why do exes come back? You have become successful

When the breakup is already over and even the bitter aftertaste has long turned into only memories, women are often faced with the fact that the man returns, and this event always takes him by surprise. Why do men come back after a breakup, and is it worth thinking about resuming a relationship?

Psychology of male behavior

If men return after a breakup, psychology explains this act by several subconscious, and sometimes conscious, levers in the man’s behavior. It is possible to describe only in general terms the reasons why men return to their exes, but it is quite difficult to fully know the reason, since each person has his own motives for behavior.

Lack of attention

Every person needs love. Monotony and everyday life are boring not only for women, but also for men - this is one of the reasons why men return. To put this phenomenon in simple terms, the man left, found a replacement, made a mistake, and decided to return.

New sensations quickly become boring, and it turns out that the new passion also has its drawbacks. Here comes the realization that the former relationship was warmer, more familiar, more familiar, where all the pitfalls were already familiar - that’s why guys return to ex-girlfriends.

Often married older men find themselves in this situation. They are seduced by youth and beauty, they rush into new relationships with a whirlwind, and then get a surprise. A young girl is in no hurry to commit herself to life and marriage; she is interested in spending time in public places, entertainment, and sexual relations. When a man realizes that ironed shirts and hot dinners are not waiting for him any time soon, he wants to return.

Feeling of competition

The next reason why exes come back when they are let go is an almost primal sense of competition. This model of behavior is not alien to the animal world, just as it is not alien to people. A modern man is sure that after a breakup, a woman should, at least for the rest of her life, follow him, suffer, cry and under no circumstances start new romances.

As soon as a guy finds out that his ex-girlfriend has a new boyfriend, he will immediately decide to return. This will be done in order to drive away the so-called rival, to reason with the girl and make her fall in love with him again.

Why, and most importantly, what next? And then he will return again to where he came from, until he again receives news of his ex’s new romance.

Playing on feelings

There are also more cynical reasons why a man returns, even if you have completely broken up. This applies mainly to those men who, having returned, strive to break up again and so on in a circle.

Such a person is an egoist and a narcissist; he cannot imagine his life without playing on other people’s feelings. He wants to prove to himself every time that this woman will accept him and will always forgive him, no matter how long after he returns.

In the most extreme case, he can simply ruin a woman’s life, and this will not bother him at all. In addition, such behavior can drive a person to suicide if the woman really has sincere feelings and really accepts him, no matter how long it takes him to come.

Holy simplicity

This is one of the reasons why exes in already quite middle-aged couples return. A man aged 45+ is seduced by a young girl. It seems to him that she is only interested in his illnesses, problems, crises, but she is completely uninterested in his wallet. As soon as it turns out that he was mistaken, he returns to his wife and even reproaches her for being angry. They have adult children and grandchildren on the way, how can this be?

Intimate harmony

Another reason why ex-boyfriends want to get back is a harmonious sexual relationship. Moreover, this is also one of the reasons why girls return to their ex-lovers.

If the couple was connected only by sex, which suited both of them completely, then the emotional relationship, in essence, was just a shell. A man or woman will sooner or later leave the couple, trying to find new interesting connections and try their luck. Also, the cause may be pregnancy or illness - conditions in which intimacy fades into the background.

Having searched for new sensations, the guys become bored, and they are already planning the scenario for their return. The girls go even further and depict the pangs of separation. And the relationship continues from the moment it left off, when one of the couple went towards new sensations.

Duty and responsibility

A sense of responsibility is the reason why girls return to their exes, but it can also happen the other way around. There is also a share of pride here, like, how will abandoned love manage without me? It is especially likely that the responsible person will return if the abandoned person begins a series of problems.

In fact, whether in this situation the woman is a mistress or a legal wife, the psychology of return lies only in duty. There can be no talk of any love; the man simply forgets that he once loved this woman. As soon as he helps her cope with the problems that have piled up, he will have to be released again.

Love for a child

Not only women in their lifetime, but also men, more than once returned after a while because they missed their children. In addition, the man also feels some remorse that his beloved children will be raised by the new love of his ex-wife.

Children can also ask their father to return to the family. If he returns, the relationship between the former spouses can develop in very different ways, but they will still be based on love for the children.

Life for two families

There is a model of behavior in which a young spouse leaves a newly built family nest quite early. When such men get tired of a new passion, they will definitely and quite sincerely return, because in a first marriage everything is so familiar and familiar. But it won't last long.

Such sprees last until someone equally familiar and dear appears on the side, as a result of which life for two families is born. The saddest thing is that this situation is usually known to all sides of the triangle and eats them up, including the culprit.

What to do in such a situation

Psychologists recommend looking at the situation purely individually. Often a man notices that his wife is getting older and is not the cheerful and energetic girl she used to be, but, unfortunately, the man does not admit that he is becoming the same.

It all depends on how much it hurts the spouse, whether she is ready to protect herself from male pride, and what kind of relationship there was between them. After all, sometimes a spouse leaves only to be alone during a psychological crisis and nothing more, while really loving the woman.

Parting…

But no one is perfect in this world, and it happens that at one moment everything changes. It would seem that just yesterday the chosen one looked at his woman with a look full of love and passion, but today he is cold and as if completely closed to communication. Sometimes cooling in a relationship occurs temporarily, but it happens that this leads to the fact that the couple ceases to exist. The man leaves, and, left alone, the woman can only think and wonder what the man will decide after the breakup. Will he come back?

Why did it happen so?

Having the fact of a discrepancy, you should initially understand the reasons for what happened. It’s no secret that the atmosphere in a relationship directly depends on the woman. So what most often leads to breakups? There are different reasons:

• The feeling that everything has become boring. Feelings lose their sharpness over time - this is inevitable, but every woman can try to refresh them.
• Absorption by everyday life. Many ladies place household chores much higher than the need to devote personal time to their chosen one. Even in the cleanest and most tidy house, hardly anyone will like this. A man can afford a housekeeper, a cook, as well as the rest of the household staff; he needs his chosen one to spend time and feelings together.
• Communicating with your lover in a demanding tone. Sooner or later, even the most persistent will escape from such moral oppression. No man can stand complaints.
• Conflicts with relatives on the part of the woman, in which she does not take his side.
• A fading passion that no action is taken to restore.
• Lack of love and deep feelings.

What should a woman do if she wants a man to return?

After a period of emotional distress, pouring tears into the pillow and several evenings spent in the company of girlfriends, discussing which guys are ungrateful, a stage comes when something needs to change. Whether men return after a breakup mainly depends on the woman's attitude - what measures will be taken and what result will follow.

The first thing to do is take care of yourself. Left alone, a woman gets a little more free time, which should not be spent bursting into tears, reveling in her own grief and complaining to everyone she meets about her tragic fate. This period can be perfectly filled with useful activities. First of all, calm down, listen to yourself, understand what you want and not what you need. It's time to love your nature. This is where building healthy and happy relationships with people around you begins. A woman who values ​​and loves herself will definitely attract a worthy partner.

Thoughts of men

I wonder what men think after a breakup? As a rule, they also try to understand themselves and their feelings. Some people just try to take a break from their life together, devote time to hobbies, and meet with friends. Those who immediately jumped into a new one from a previous relationship enjoy the novelty of communication, burning passion, etc. In the initial period, the time comes when a man makes a choice - to remain alone, develop a new relationship, or return to his ex-woman.

Actions and feelings of a young man

The behavior of men after a breakup is sometimes surprising. Especially if the initiative to break up lies with him. Instead of completely disappearing from his ex’s life, he begins to look for meetings, regularly reminds him of himself, and tries to attract attention. Often a man calls after a breakup, catching his ex by surprise. Such actions occur when the perpetrator of the breakup feels confused. After all, he is not used to being alone, making any decisions on his own, especially if the couple has been together for a long period of time.

A man's feelings after a breakup are ambiguous. On the one hand, he is overwhelmed by a feeling of freedom and lightness, on the other hand, he often becomes a hostage to this situation. At first this does not pose any problem. However, then the situation becomes a little more complicated. When a man is simply left alone with himself, it is much easier for him to figure things out.

If a young man has another girlfriend...

If at this moment he is in the company of a new chosen one, he most often just wants to run away. The relationship seems to captivate him, but it’s one thing to sneakily see his mistress, enjoy intrigue and passionate meetings, and quite another thing to live with her on the same territory. In everyday life one gets to know oneself as well as possible. And a once sweet stranger can instantly turn into a grumpy roommate. It happens that having caught his chosen one communicating with his ex, the current passion shows his true face for the first time.

Possible scenarios

Further events develop according to several scenarios:

• If the reason for the separation is leaving for another woman, then, despite all the pain and tragedy of what happened, you need to try to save your own face, and also part ways on an amicable note. You never know how life will turn out and what will happen over time. Perhaps the new relationship is not destined to develop into something more, then there is a chance to do everything to ensure that the man returns after breaking up.
• When a young man goes nowhere, simply because his passion has faded. This often happens after many years of family life, when the children become adults, and nothing connects him with his wife. In this case, you can try to get your husband back by simply talking to him honestly. Maybe we should give him more freedom. Older men like to devote their free time to their favorite activities, such as fishing, hunting, etc. During this period, it is better to support your partner; with his permission, you can join his hobby. Then, perhaps, common interests and topics for communication will emerge.
• If a man is tired of seeing his chosen one in an unkempt state, always dissatisfied and offended, then he needs to take care of himself as effectively as possible. And don't complain about lack of time.
  There are now many ways to make life easier. Get yourself in order, visit a cosmetologist, hairdresser, get a manicure and pedicure. Take time for a relaxing massage. Having transformed, tune in to a friendly mood. Ask your chosen one to help you improve your relationship. This will give you a better understanding of why men come back after a breakup. The psychology of the action will become more clear. This means that in the future it will be possible to eliminate all the reasons leading to a break in the relationship.

If you look at it, it becomes obvious that the answer to the question of whether men return after a breakup depends largely on the woman herself. If she sees the point in continuing the relationship, there are still unsaid kind words and not everything has been done together, then this will certainly be the case. Further, on the initiative of the woman, everything will happen so that the union is reunited. If there is no point in further efforts, as in the relationship itself, then there is no point in trying.

When a man returns after a breakup, a woman has a choice - to take him back or burn her bridges and let him float freely. In any case, after this moment, life will change forever. After the events experienced, neither of the couple will remain the same.

Why is it coming back?

There are many reasons why men come back after a breakup. Human psychology is structured in a complex way, so it’s worth understanding everything in order. Men come back because:

• They feel uncomfortable being without their chosen one; her role in their life is quite large.
• In comparison, truth is born. It often happens that the ex, in the opinion of the man, has better qualities than the new passion.
• A representative of the stronger half of humanity sometimes needs time to understand how deep his feelings are for his former chosen one. When they are serious enough, the relationship resumes.

These are the most common reasons why men come back after a breakup. Psychology is a complex thing, it’s not that easy to understand. There are actually as many reasons to return to your previous relationship as there are personal views. But still, you can find some clues in those listed.

If he came back to you...

When a man returns after a breakup and a woman decides to take him back, the stage begins to restore trust and the relationship as a whole. Now it is important to take into account all the reasons for the breakup and prevent mistakes from being repeated. It doesn’t hurt to always find time to put yourself in order and organize it in your house or apartment. From now on, you should also replace all claims, reproaches and accusations with requests. Praise your man more and say nice words to him more often.

Old relationships in a new way

Now it’s clear why men come back after a breakup. They need a new relationship, but with an already proven partner. During this period, he receives more attention, less reproaches and pressure. Life is getting better, relationships are getting a new lease of life. Now a woman needs to show all her wisdom and establish a connection with her loved one. An important component of a full-fledged relationship in which both partners are happy is, of course, intimate intimacy.

In this you should show your imagination, buy underwear for special occasions, at least sometimes create a suitable atmosphere and often delight your loved one with bodily caresses. The same goes for tactile touch every day. You can get a relaxing massage after a working day that will relieve fatigue and tension. Pay more attention and effort to this, and soon life will begin as if all over again.

Exodus

When the relationship returns to its previous course with renewed vigor, it is no longer particularly important why men return after breaking up. Human psychology is structured in such a way that if at first there was interest in analyzing the root cause, it is later lost. Partners are simply trying to improve their relationship.

When the outcome of a breakup is not so rosy, you just have to come to terms with it. This happens in life, and it is better to really let go of the person, and with him the situation, although it is not easy. Over time, life will show that such an act was the best decision of all possible.

Any person in his life has gone through such a test as parting with a loved one. It is very offensive and sad when you are abandoned, and you are deprived of the feelings that you had for the person.

But in order to better survive the moment of parting, there should be friends nearby who will calm you down in difficult times and always support you. Many ladies say: “don’t worry, it’ll work itself out and come back.” And in most cases this is exactly what happens. A man leaves a girl, and then realizes that he loves her and therefore returns.

Reasons for leaving

In fact, there are many reasons why a guy can leave and leave a girl. In some cases, the girl herself is to blame, sometimes this happens on the initiative of the guy. So, the reasons that prompt a man to end a relationship lie in the following:

• Bored with everyday relationships.
• The guy found someone else.
• He no longer likes his companion and his passion has faded.
• The man realized that it was love.
• A man cannot support such a woman.
• The man realized that he does not want to live a long life with you, you are not his person.
• Your partner is intimidated by your relatives or friends.

Many women, after a breakup, begin to blame themselves for the fact that they behaved incorrectly. But you shouldn’t blame only yourself for a breakup; most often, both partners are to blame for this.

What to do to get your man back

Very often it depends on a woman’s behavior whether a man will return to her or not. The woman herself must push her chosen one to reconsider whether he really wants to continue the relationship. But in order to restore the relationship, you need to act competently, calculating your every step and action.

To return a man to your family, you need to listen to the following recommendations:

• After breaking up, you need to find a reason and meet a man. But only the meeting should take place in a positive way, from which only positive emotions should remain. You can remember pleasant moments and stories from your life together. You need to open up to a man on the other side so that he falls in love with you again and wants to continue the relationship.
• A woman should show a man how beautiful she is and who he has lost. To do this, you need to change your image and buy new clothes.
• If after a breakup a man is alone, then he needs to be provided with the warmth and tenderness that he so lacks.

But if a man leaves for another woman, it is unlikely that he will be returned b. You just need to come to terms with it and understand that this is fate, and it’s better for you if you break up with the man now.

Why do men come back?

Life is a complicated thing, and situations in it can be different. And when a man returns after breaking up, the woman begins to rack her brains over questions: why did he come back? Is it worth it or not to accept him into the family?

The following will describe common reasons why a man returns to his family:

• Having lived alone, a man understands that it’s hard for him without his woman, and therefore, after weighing the pros and cons, he finally decides to return the whole relationship.
• If a man left you only because of boredom, when he starts dating his mistress, he begins to compare the two women. And when he realizes that the one he left is better, he leaves his mistress and returns to his beloved and unique one.
• If, after breaking up, a man finds out that his ex has someone, then he will want to return to her and win the lady’s favor, because he understands what kind of woman he missed.
• Men may return out of curiosity to see how their former partner lives. Usually such relationships do not last long.
• There are rare, but still possible, cases when a man realizes that he has made a mistake and wants to return all the previous relationships and correct the mistakes.
• If a man loves you very much, then after breaking up he will want to return to you, and he simply cannot imagine life without you.

Every woman must decide whether to accept her former life partner or not. You need to understand what kind of relationship will exist between you after the breakup. In general, everything depends on the specific situation and the behavior of the partners in it. The reason for the separation of lovers must also be taken into account.

Relationships after the return of a loved one

If you still accept back the man who left you, you need to prepare for the fact that your relationship may be somewhat different from the one that proceeded before the separation. But a woman must show her wisdom in order to avoid making previous mistakes.

Before accepting a loved one, you need to answer the following questions:

1. Do you really love your partner?
2. Are you confusing pity with love?
3. You definitely need the person who once abandoned you.
4. Are you ready to change yourself and learn to seek compromises?
5. Are you confident in your partner?

You need to take into account that for a good relationship you need to work on yourself and change so that the man does not have the desire to leave you again.

To make your relationship perfect, you need to follow these tips:

• There is no need to complain about your problems so as not to become boring for your partner.
• There is no need to argue with your partners often and irritate them.
• You need to be restrained and learn to remain silent at the right moments.
• You need to be sexy and satisfy your partner so that he feels good next to you.

First of all, a woman must love and respect her partner, only in this way the union will be long and strong.

There are also situations when a man leaves forever, but you should not worry about this. You need to be glad that fate took you away from such a person and look forward to meeting a partner worthy of you. There is no need to get hung up on one person, maybe he is not as good as you think. You need to reconsider your attitude towards your partner and understand that he is simply not worthy of you.

Yesterday I looked into your eyes,
And now everything is looking sideways!
M. Tsvetaeva.

That's all. The fairy tale is over. The curtain fell. Life has lost its colors. He left. It is unlikely that any of us, having fallen desperately and recklessly in love, imagine that a romantic relationship, so bright and exciting, will end with a tightly closed door and silence in an empty apartment... And the heart will freeze not from tender confessions, but from cold words: “It’s all over. I'm leaving". But it also happens. Often.

Come back, my love!

No one was more intimate to me,
So no one tormented me,
Even the one who betrayed him to torment
Even the one who caressed and forgot.
A. Akhmatova

Do men get back after a breakup? Do they regret their decision?.... What should I change in myself to get him back?.... An abandoned woman desperately seeks answers to these questions, calls “him,” asks friends, goes to a psychologist for advice. Cries, struggles with pain and depression. It's hard to believe after everything that's happened, but yes, they are coming back. Often. When you don't expect it anymore.

I do not regret, do not call, do not cry…

I'll stop waiting for you
And you will come quite suddenly.
V. Tushnova

A broken heart takes a long time to recover, but now the pain is not so sharp, life has improved, a career has taken off, and even a fan has appeared. And suddenly a call: “Hello, dear! How are you without me?". You can hear from his intonations that he is sorry and is ready to try to restore the relationship. And life narrows down to a single question - why do men come back after breaking up?

Nobody loves me like you do

The power of passions is a coming thing.
Slowly learn the strength of another.
People have adventures of the body.
There are adventures of thoughts and feelings.
E. Yevtushenko

Psychologists identify several main reasons why the “ex” reappears in the life of the woman he abandoned. One of them: I walked around, compared and realized that I had rushed to conclusions. He wanted novelty, acuity, adventure. It turned out that new partners also want an easy relationship, pleasant sex and no responsibility.

A man’s return after a breakup occurs when he gets tired of “physics” and wants soulfulness. What the abandoned woman gave him: devotion, sincere love and tenderness. Yes, and delicious dinners, an ironed shirt, and a clean house will not be superfluous.

Mine, period!

The prey can be - well, anything:
Career, woman, family or friends.
You just need to hold it for a long time.
You cannot share the “game” with your rivals.
From the Internet

In men, two feelings are very closely intertwined - jealousy and possessiveness. Leaving a woman, he is sure that she must now suffer from love for him for the rest of her life and remain faithful. Having learned that someone has taken the “holy place”, the “ex” will immediately decide to return everything “to normal” and will begin calling, making dates and assuring that feelings have flared up again.

When a man returns after a breakup, think about whether the reason is jealousy? If this is so, then having achieved his goal, he will again grow cold towards his “property”, and the woman will again plunge into grief, loneliness and tears.

As an experiment

Tell me why are you playing with me?
Inspiring fragile unnecessary dreams?
From the Internet

If a man returns after a breakup, leaves again, then returns again, he is simply selfish. He doesn’t care about rivals or their absence, he needs proof of power over a woman - absolute and limitless. Such, as an experiment, is capable of ruining the life of one and calmly taking on another. What’s interesting is that he won’t feel any remorse.

Or maybe, after all, Love?

At this moment I don’t need anything from life,
I'm ready to give up everything now -
If only I could freeze from my beloved gaze,
And every breath makes you drunk...
Victor Goffman

Can a man come back after a breakup for reasons that are not so selfish and joyless? Maybe. Simply because he realized that he loved her, abandoned and betrayed. Perhaps he was dating someone else. Or maybe I was thinking alone. Really suffered. I was scared of a serious relationship, tried to avoid it, but found myself unable to live without her, the one and only one.

Should I believe him or not? Any advice here is useless. Only time can confirm or refute the honesty of his confessions. If you have the strength to endure and wait, then give him a second chance.

A man is not judged by his rank,
Not for the money what he brings into the house,
A man is not judged by his height,
He is not judged by his age.
They are not judged by dexterity and strength,
Not according to glory, which is sometimes empty,
And not because he is handsome -
External beauty will fade.
They judge for the wrong reason
That people all around take their example from him,
and in relation to men and women.
And this is the main court.
V. Orlov

The difficult period of separation is over. Napkins wet from tears were thrown away, empty wine containers moved to the trash container, all the advice of girlfriends was listened to and taken into account. Life gets better, sometimes a new love appears with all the bright colors adopted for this occasion. And here, like a bolt from the blue, is the “return of the prodigal parrot,” and precisely when (as a rule) the woman no longer needs it. Why do men come back after a breakup? Let’s try to figure out the psychology of return, what it consists of.

Psychologists have identified several situations in which a man tends to return to his former passion after a breakup. And it doesn’t depend on who he left: a gray mouse or a successful beauty, it’s all about his own internal psychology, his ego, his life preferences.

Why such situations occur can only be said approximately; the psychology of separations and returns has been studied quite well, but a person is not a soulless mechanism; each specific case has its own nuances and a man’s own motives for why he should return.

• Nobody loves Me

The psychology of any person is such that he needs love. What can I say, monotony in life is equally boring for both men and women, but due to natural egocentrism, the stronger sex can simply turn around and leave; their sense of responsibility is much less pronounced than that of women. But why do men come back again after a breakup? The psychology of this behavior is as follows: they compared, had a walk, and realized that they were in a hurry to leave. The novelty of feelings has become boring, bright masks have been torn off, and it turns out that the previous relationship was better, “more convenient.” Very often, experienced married men who are seduced by the beauty and youth of their new partner fall into this trap and happily change their “old” wife. But here an unpleasant surprise awaits them: the young passion is in no hurry to arrange a “heavenly life” with a cozy life, clean shirts and delicious lunches and dinners, but the man is so used to them. And when he gets tired of “physics”, he returns.

• “Game” is not shared with rivals

Oddly enough, the “legs” of the next reason why a man returns after a breakup grow from primitive instincts. The psychology of this is seen in the animal world, where jealousy and possessiveness rule the world. A modern man, leaving a woman, is one hundred percent sure that she must suffer and yearn for him for the rest of her life and, God forbid, start a new romance.

Very often, jealousy and the presence of new fans from his ex-wife becomes a compelling reason for a man to return.

Having learned that a rival has taken the “holy place,” the man immediately returns after parting to “drive away the stranger” and bring some sense into his former passion. Therefore, if a man who left once again began calling and looking for meetings, think: this could be banal jealousy. Having driven off his opponent, he will again leave his native land, and this will always be the case.

• As an experiment

If a man leaves, then returns and, having again provoked a separation, disappears, he is simply an egoist, a man who masterfully and with gusto loves to play on the “strings of the soul” of another person. At a young age, such “games” are often started by teenagers who want to establish themselves in a crowd of friends. Then the woman, her feelings and in general, the presence or absence of rivals, her position in society and material status are indifferent. He wants proof of power over a woman, limitless and absolute! He can methodically ruin the life (sometimes with a fatal outcome) of a woman and calmly switch to another, and, oh God, he doesn’t feel any remorse. This murderous psychology is an experiment, nothing more.

• Naive like a child

This psychology of return is characteristic, first of all, of aging men who, having lived their entire lives with one woman, naively believe that the “unearthly nymph” they met along the way is interested exclusively in his gout, intellectual and physical impotence, belching, brightly shiny bald head, but not with a wallet. And when an epiphany comes to them, such men return after the separation they themselves provoked and try to reason with the spouse who is pushing them back to the “nymph”: “how can you, we have grandchildren.”

• Harmony in sex

Harmony in relationships is the key to a strong family.

Do not forget that sexual relations in the family come first for a man. And when he does not receive proper release, he leaves. The reasons why this happens are different: the wife’s pregnancy, her constant fatigue, illness and much more. But if, in addition to sex, the couple had a harmonious emotional relationship, he, having received what he wanted on the side, returns after breaking up. Psychologically, this can be explained simply - physically he “nourished” himself, but emotionally there was emptiness. And he, trying to fill the gap, returns after parting as if nothing had happened.

• Call of Duty

Sometimes men return after a breakup out of a sense of duty, due to a series of serious problems that have arisen for the “abandoned woman.” Psychologically, there is no smell of love here; the man only has a developed innate sense of responsibility towards his former passion or children.

• Love for children

Children deter not only women, but also men from making the final decision to leave the family.

In some cases, men return after separation because they cannot imagine that their children will be raised by another man. Or the children themselves ask to return. Relationships between adults in this case can be built according to different scenarios, but the basis for return is sincere love for children.

• Lifelong binges

It happens that men who have already created a new family return after separation because they began to miss their former wife, who over the years has become a loved one. In a new relationship, everything seems normal, but foreign. Psychologists say that such “binges” can last a lifetime and take the form of “life for two families.”

• And you are beautiful again

Of course, no one will argue that everyday life and family leave an imprint on a woman’s appearance, and sometimes not the most attractive one. A man, going outside, is looking for a beautiful object of adoration, and this is normal. But in the case when an abandoned woman realizes the reason for her lover’s departure and quickly puts herself in order, he, dumbfounded by her new unusual image, returns back after the breakup. What bothered him was fixed, and he already liked everything else.

• Every breath makes you drunk

Oddly enough, but sometimes the question of why a man returns after a breakup can be answered: love. Yes, yes, he left the woman he loved, but only in order to understand and realize: he needs her. Perhaps he was comparing, perhaps he was simply alone and, having sorted everything out, decided to return.

What to do?

According to psychologists, a man sees a woman losing her youthful attractiveness and growing old, but in no case does he realize that he has also aged. Next to his 40-50 year old wife, he feels like the same boy of 20-25 years old. When (after leaving) insight comes, the men return.

What should a woman do, how to understand the psychology of separation and timely separate the wheat from the chaff? Probably the best thing is not to make hasty decisions (it’s he who has returned, this is his return), so it’s worth taking a closer look and checking the sincerity of intentions. There is no need to idealize the situation; as practice shows, “return syndrome” is more often a disease of infantile men than a completely conscious choice of a strong husband.

Some women can understand a man only after making a lot of effort, despite the fact that male psychology is not as complicated as it might seem at first glance. However, this does not at all mean male mediocrity and predictability. The point is that they are specific and not love complications.

It is required to learn the basic properties of the psychology of the stronger sex in order to improve the understanding of male characteristics and understand how to express a reaction to their actions.

Temper and emotionality

The stronger sex is characterized by pressure, impatience and aggression, the ability to resist and willpower. They are proud of their determination and strength and are aimed at superiority over others, due to their own vanity and special sensitivity to the outcome of the competitive struggle. Even if they don't express their feelings as emotionally as women, they also tend to feel resentful, irritable, and mopey. But the facial expression, at the same time, can remain restrained and only indirect signs will help to guess about his bad mood. This is why male psychology causes such difficulties for a woman, because she cannot always understand what exactly is bothering her partner, because he does not express it in any way. Take it for granted: a man can get upset because of something that can affect his pride.

Pride and self-respect

Critical remarks and constant mention of his shortcomings and mistakes have a tangible impact on a man’s pride. You should know that once you have spoken about an unpleasant moment, you need to close the topic and not return to it again. Because men act in a similar way - having expressed their opinion once in a conflict situation, they do not mention it.

A sense of freedom and independence is important to them. They do not lack self-respect, and self-esteem is most often inflated, but this is forgiven them, because conquerors and pioneers cannot do without it.

At the same time, while attaching great importance to the opinions and assessments of the people around them, they are extremely inattentive to themselves. Their significant other may change their hairstyle or put on new jewelry, cry recently or worry about something, but this is not noticeable to the man.

Is it possible to understand a man's speech?

This is not so difficult to do, because, basically, the stronger sex tries to talk about what they really think. In the case of deceptive speeches, this becomes noticeable. The main difficulty lies in men's reticence. If everything is good, then there is no need to talk about it, and when something happens and requires immediate decisive action, a man prefers to engage in action rather than talk. Because of this, they have difficulties in stressful or shock situations: they have a hard time bearing this news, but it is more difficult for them to talk through problematic circumstances than to cope with them physically. The result follows from this: a man’s reluctance to talk is not an indicator of his indifferent or indifferent attitude; he may, in fact, not know what he should say.

What should be done to understand men's feelings?

Males feel love differently than women. Although their manifestations do not always involve flowers and beautiful everyday confessions. They are truly confident that words spoken once are sufficient. Because talking a lot is not their strong point. It is worth paying attention to the actions of a man, and not to his conversation about them.

When a man feels love for a woman, he singles her out from everyone else, calling her his own, without hiding it from others: my soulmate, wife, future wife. You won’t need any reminders from him about the necessary financial investments; he himself will try to provide for your needs in a timely manner. Will try to protect against all possible threats.

If his opinion is important to you, you should ask about it directly, without hinting. Do not be satisfied with banal sweet words, find out further why he thinks this way, and if there is no answer, there is a possibility that by maintaining your relationship he is pursuing his own goals and does not have strong emotions for you. A person in love will not keep you waiting for an explanation about his attitude towards you.#How to awaken feelings in him!?#

What makes a man come back?

Often, when breaking up with a man, a woman is consoled by the belief that he will come back anyway.

There is a variety of data on this matter, because no one conducts official statistical studies. Only some women cannot understand what makes men leave and then return. Most often, it happens when she has already started a new relationship, but she has managed to completely forget about the past. Others are tormented by doubts about the return of former men, since this has not happened to them themselves. And yet, it is not uncommon for representatives of the stronger sex to come, and, also, cases of non-return are frequent.

In what cases can a man leave but come back?

1. He returns because he understands exactly where happiness lies for him. However, this is the most desirable outcome for a woman, but not such a frequent outcome: a man leaving a long-term relationship, as a rule, goes into the arms of another woman and he has no need to remember his uninteresting ex-partner.
2. It happens that a man who left the family boat comes back after a short period of time, but this happens not because of an unsuccessful comparison of one person with another. It’s just that in long-term relationships, a man suffers from a lack of novelty, given other favorable conditions. This is how a lover appears on the side, and often a man leaves to try to get along, to another family, for a variety of sensations, but for a while, and not at all. Result: they come back after a short time.
3. The situation is special if a man breaks off ties, and when he returns, he takes great care of you and showers you with promises of mountains of gold. Most often this happens when the half left by him has already begun another relationship, marriage is expected. It is quite likely that men are driven by banal envy: having heard that the person abandoned by him is improving her life, while he is unsettled, she decides that this is wrong, that having lost such a miracle, she did not even put an end to her existence. What else can change this, if not the desire for spoiled living conditions for your formerly abandoned friends. The goal of all his courtship and exhortations comes down to disrupting the nascent relationship with a new partner. As soon as this happens and you give the returnee a second opportunity, he will disappear from your horizon, since he simply did not need this.
4. It happens: after a couple breaks up, the man does not call or write. Then, suddenly, a call comes from him and a real nostalgic conversation starts about his loneliness and your past wonderful relationship. There is, of course, a possibility that he has already realized everything and, upon returning, will change his behavior, and life will improve, but the truth of life does not confirm this, unfortunately. Most often, this happens from a man’s desire to rest somewhere, for some period of time. He can systematically call the phone numbers of all past partners, hoping for pity from one of them, because female nature requires obligatory care for someone. When can we expect the return of such individuals? So the same hour as soon as they feel sad or lonely. An abandoned half is an excellent option that does not require conquest.

All this should help you understand the reasons that contribute to a man’s return and treat your friends’ assurances that this will definitely happen with a certain degree of skepticism.

Quite often you can hear that life consists of a series of disappointments and losses, losses and partings. Is it really? But then what about the popular wisdom that everything that the Lord gives will certainly turn out for the better? And can we consider that a man leaving is some kind of positive in life? And anyway, why do men leave?

And why do they leave not only ugly and stupid women, but also women who are actually smart, beautiful, wonderful lovers, and amazing housewives? Is it really just to come back later? And one more interesting question: will all men who left their family or previous relationships really come back?

Some statistics

Statistics show that the breakdown of relationships, and especially the breakdown of a family, entails the most serious consequences that pose a threat to health and even life.

For example, breakup and divorce often lead not only to depression, but also to suicide attempts. It is interesting that if previously it was mainly the fairer sex who complained about a depressed state, then in the last one and a half to two decades there has been an increase in appeals to psychologists and psychotherapists by men who are also having a hard time with a breakup, even in cases where they themselves were the initiator of the breakup.

The statistics are inexorable: most men, even leaving their family (it doesn’t matter whether it’s a civil or official marriage), will begin to build a new family in the next five years. Please note: they will not look for temporary connections, but will try to build long-term relationships. And today there are about 65% of such men, and this figure is constantly growing. It is very interesting that most men quite sincerely believe that the “ex” was still better than any next woman who appears in life.

However, the remaining 35% are not those who never again tie the knot in new relationships, including marriage: approximately 25% of men get married more than five years after the breakup of their previous family, and only a few try to create new serious relationships through two decades (or even more) after the first breakup.

Unfortunately, according to statistics, men who cannot decide on their attachments spend the best years of their lives alone (without a family).

It's no secret that sometimes men who left their family try to return to their old life, to their old family, to their old wife, offering to start all over again and try again. Why is this happening? And how often does this happen?

The truth about whether “ex” men always come back

All-knowing sociology claims that not all men make an attempt to return to their former girlfriend or even their former wife. Moreover, such behavior does not depend on age, financial status, or religious beliefs - that is, it does not depend on anything at all. In a word, not everyone returns and not always.

The idea that any man will definitely return is a myth created by those who are trying to console a woman who is experiencing the departure of a man and the breakdown of a relationship. It is interesting that this myth has existed for a very long time, and it is most often supported by women themselves.

A daughter, goddaughter, best friend are crying from a seemingly irrevocable loss... Well, how can one not console and assure that “he won’t go anywhere, because they all come back.”

Again, if a woman (and especially a young girl) believes that a traitor and traitor will certainly knock on a familiar door again, then it is really easier for her to survive the breakup, because, firstly, she understands that she must be attractive (at just in case); secondly, she must strive and achieve something in order to show when meeting that she herself is able to cope with everything; thirdly, it’s easier to find some activities (from cooking courses to learning Japanese) in order to demonstrate that you’re busy on occasion.

Of course, if there are children left in the family left behind, then you don’t have to look for additional activities so often, because children always require a lot of attention, and a lot of time and effort.

Unfortunately, the fact remains: the same omniscient statistics claim that the return of a departed man should still be perceived not as a pattern, but as a kind of exception. And it’s hardly any consolation that more often than not, the next chosen one of an unfaithful person will most likely resemble the abandoned one - in any case, this happens almost all the time.

Why does a man either return or leave for good?

It turns out that a man (age doesn’t matter) can leave and come back or leave and disappear forever. What should we look for the reason?

First, let's answer the question of what the relationship between a man and a woman is based on. Of course, the answer will be words about love, affection, admiration. But in fact, at the heart of any romantic relationship there is a certain agreement, which most often no one speaks out loud, and sometimes does not even suspect. And only with a deep psychological analysis is it revealed what exactly the relationship of a particular couple was built on.

The basis of such a unique agreement on which the couple’s relationship is based can be a sexual component, a financial or any other material component, an emotional component, or a combination of them in any proportion.

Of course, in the overwhelming majority of cases, neither party communicates either its claims or its obligations under such an agreement, but it is the violation of obligations that leads to both the rupture of the agreement and the severance of relations.

It is absolutely clear that if a man believed that dinner and comfort would always be waiting for him at home, but in fact the woman is not even going to cook, then the love of such a couple will disappear very quickly. But if a man got married so that he would always have a beautiful and uninhibited sexual partner at hand, then cutlets most likely will not interest him, but classic statements about headaches will put an end to the relationship very quickly.

Very often, violations of such a unique and often tacit agreement are discovered at the beginning of a relationship, which is why many marriages collapse in the first years, or even in the first months.

The initiator of a breakup is most often the woman, since it is the woman who perceives everything that happens more emotionally and does not want to forgive deception, lies, or, even worse, betrayal. This is especially pronounced at the beginning of a relationship, when there are no children yet and there are many opportunities to build a new relationship with another person.

No matter how strange it may seem, men most often return to those women who themselves broke off the relationship and showed the man the door. If a man left on his own, on his own initiative, then the chances of his return tend to zero, and any attempts to return him will be either completely unsuccessful or very short-lived.

What happens? If a man was expelled from the family because he seriously “messed up,” then it is he who will try to return. Why?

What reasons do men most often give for leaving their families?

Meetings, walks, parks, boats... Cinema, kisses, ice cream... The decision to live together and life together in all its glory, that is, with everyday problems, without romance, with dripping taps and bills for electricity, telephone and other utility bills...

They say that it is because of everyday life that many family boats break, however, as the results of sociological research show, in those families where there are no material problems in principle, wrecks are also quite possible.

Who is guilty? This age-old question always requires a complete and honest answer. How do you determine a guilty man? What reasons do they give most often for leaving their family?

Reason #1, it is also a completely universal reason for leaving the family, - incompatibility of characters. It’s interesting that the concept of “character incompatibility” is sometimes interpreted into something completely different: sometimes it’s an outlook on life, sometimes an opinion about Chinese cuisine; sometimes temperament, sometimes political views; either the presence of bad habits, or an unwillingness to take into account the opinion of the other half... Most often, the banal phrase “incompatibility of characters” can hide disrespect for each other, lack of love and mutual understanding. And if no one in the family hears anyone, understands, or respects anyone, then where do the characters have to do with it? And what kind of family are we talking about?

But it may also be that a man does not want to give up his bachelor habits (walks almost until the morning, spends money solely at his own discretion, throws socks and towels together in the wash) and does not want to hear any objections. And again: are we talking about character compatibility? Probably, behind the words about incompatibility, the man is simply trying to hide some of his shortcomings, inability or unwillingness to negotiate and make concessions.

Reason No. 2 - the wife’s untidiness. It happens that men cite the reason for a broken relationship as the lack of a manicure or a spouse’s hairstyle, or an old tracksuit, or wrinkles that have appeared, or rough skin on their hands... They say that men love with their eyes, that is, their delicate mental organization cannot come to terms with an unfashionable haircut, or with hair dyed at the wrong time, or worn out slippers...

And it would be understandable, albeit with difficulty, if such claims were made by a certain handsome man well-groomed to the tips of his nails, but often such or similar claims are made by a creature in holey socks and training trousers with outstretched knees. And this citizen’s refined taste is offended by the lack of a French manicure on his wife’s hands? Is there nothing that can offend the wife in this sad spectacle? Or maybe the golden treasure offered to vacuum the apartment, or even wash the kitchen? Yeah, wait! But don’t rush around with a mop and rag in an evening dress, so that your loved one can delight his rather beer-stained gaze!

Of course, sometimes the appearance of any person does not require a photo shoot, but you should still be realistic and understand that untidiness as a reason for breaking up a relationship can be true in about one case out of several tens, or even hundreds of thousands.

Reason number 3 - sexual dissatisfaction. It is difficult to argue that for complete harmony of family life the sexual component is very important. However, it would not hurt to take into account several more factors.

Firstly, different people have completely different temperaments, and it is very strange that this issue was not clarified even before the official marriage, because now many couples first live in a civil marriage, and only then enter into an official marriage.

Secondly, after washing, cooking, cleaning, ironing and other household chores, a woman may not always have some kind of erotic desire - a feeling of fatigue is much more likely. And what kind of rough sex is there if the only desire is just to sleep? But a woman also devotes a lot of time and effort to her children, especially when they are very young.

No one disputes that a man’s sexual appetites may sometimes remain not fully satisfied. But is a man always ready not only to frolic in bed and make his erotic fantasies come true, but also, at least partially, to relieve his wife of household chores and problems, so that she still has the desire not only to quickly fall asleep and at least get some rest?

Reason No. 4 which men call is routine. Every day is the same, every weekend is the same. No novelty, no bright emotions, nothing new and exciting...

But many men seriously consider themselves hunters! At the same time, they are somehow uninterested in “hunting” for the well-being of the family, because it is somehow monotonous. Now, if you pick up that beauty over there and head to Cyprus! Or at least to the nearest beach on the local river...

But the fact is that family life simply cannot consist of continuous fireworks and holidays and most often consists of routine tasks: cleaning, washing, cooking, caring for children and house plants or animals require consistency.

Birthdays happen only once a year, and vacations are also much shorter than routine and annoying everyday life. And the life of a long-legged beauty, which today seems like a holiday, may ultimately turn out to be even more boring and incomprehensible.

Perhaps it would be smarter to replace the word “routine” with the word “stability”?

However, are women to blame? Is it possible to control a calm, balanced, reasonable and reliable man?

And if the craving for freedom is expressed in a constant desire to “gallop off to the pampas” and in a persistent reluctance to do at least something useful in the house, then maybe let him get his freedom?

However, doesn’t this plot resemble the famous fable of Ivan Krylov? After all, any freedom and any fluttering must be ensured by something and someone. And where is he going to go in search of freedom? Maybe he knows a lady who really sincerely agrees to deal with a “free hunter”?

Reason number 6 - adultery. Whether anyone would like it or not, husbands cheat on their wives, and wives sometimes cheat on their husbands. Sometimes betrayal is accidental, sometimes it is unfortunate circumstances, but sometimes it is truly betrayal.

Let's add male pride to this, add a sense of ownership - and here you have leaving the family.

Although there are other cases where a man, even despite obvious betrayals, simply does not want to change anything in his established life and prefers to pretend that he does not notice anything.

What if this is love?

No matter how much they scold and condemn men who left the family, and no matter how stupid, far-fetched and frivolous the reasons for their leaving may seem, there is one reason that is completely valid. And this good reason is called love.

Many women who are left alone are perplexed: after all, they used to love them. What happened now?

It's no secret that over the course of a person's life, their ideas, preferences, and social circles change. And no one is surprised if a person by the age of thirty has become somewhat different than he was at eighteen. Probably, in the same way one can understand that over time the circle of friends also changes, and this process occurs especially quickly when teenagers finish school and adult life begins: some go to college, some work, some -army... And this new life can very seriously change a young man, completely change his priorities.

That is why very early marriages are extremely rarely very strong and stable: youthful delight and youthful love are replaced by mature feelings, which do not always coincide with semi-childish relationships.

Of course, it is very sad when children are left in a broken family, but it is the early pregnancy of a partner that often becomes the reason for early marriage. However, life without love is no less sad, life in an atmosphere of deception. What is it like for children in such a family? And a young mother who got married without even having time to take a closer look at life will most likely be able to find true love and build a real family.

Six main reasons for a man to return

I wonder who formulated the ancient Eastern wisdom that says that you cannot step into the same river twice? However, some men still try to return to the woman they once left, and the scenario of leaving was not always peaceful. What motivates these representatives of the strong half of the human race?

Men claim that, having been alone, they understood a lot and rethought a lot, so they are ready to try again and ask to be given a chance to prove that everything will be different. But will it happen? And what actually draws men to return?

1. The first reason is sex. If we face the truth, sexual relationships really play a huge role in every person’s life. And if the couple’s sexual relationship was very harmonious, then the man will undoubtedly want to return to them. And this is precisely what will represent a very serious incentive to return.

   However, life consists of many aspects, and if during the first attempt to create a family, some aspects of life still outweighed even the most ideal and unique sex, then where is the guarantee that everything will not happen again the second time?

   Unfortunately, adults really change so rarely that these cases are counter-intuitive and all of them can be considered exceptions. The man came back for sex?

   Wonderful! But there are many other sides to life, and if a man has not been able to satisfactorily resolve any issues other than sexual ones before, will he be able to this time? Will the woman be left with good sex this time, but with a bunch of other problems, and not only her own? And can a woman be sure that with the birth of a child, when she is completely occupied with the baby, the hero-lover will not go looking for another good sex, but this time on the side?

2. The second reason is rethinking. It is known that the best way to learn something is to experience it firsthand (the so-called experiential learning path). Having been alone and missing the comfort of home, a man can reflect and change some lines of his behavior in order to make an attempt to return.

   Of course, this option is quite possible, and a man can indeed take into account some of his wrong actions and actions. However, we should not forget that a person can change only in early childhood, and after five years all changes are most often explained only by external adaptation to the demands of society, while inside a person is unlikely to change.

   Of course, any, even the most pragmatic woman wants to believe in miracles, but in real life miracles do not happen... Has the man who swears that he has rethought everything changed? May be…

   However, upon returning to a familiar environment and familiar surroundings, it is very likely that the previous behavioral patterns will return. Of course, if a woman feels that her main purpose in life is to correct the shortcomings of an adult man, then she can make another try. However, I remember the first attempt was unsuccessful...

3. The third reason is loneliness. A man who leaves his family for some reason believes that either he doesn’t need anyone, or he can easily find a replacement for the broken relationship.

   However, real long-term loneliness suits only very few people, and finding a full-fledged replacement is also very often very difficult. Therefore, the man, having suffered himself and realizing that nothing better is in sight, makes attempts to return: he either calls by phone, or “accidentally” meets him on the street. What if you manage to infiltrate an old reliable place? And then, you see, everything will go as before...

   Of course, it happens that the return of the “prodigal parrot” can be quite successful if a person has really seriously revised some of his positions and views, but there is a very high chance of repeating old mistakes and the old path - right up to the previous ending. But this path can become more difficult and more traumatic.

4. Reason four - there was no better solution. Most men, leaving a family, think that they will be able to build a completely new relationship and that with another woman and in another family everything will be completely different.

   However, most often it doesn’t work out any other way. And this happens simply because “everyone is the same in the arena,” that is, the man has remained the same, his habits, desires and capabilities have remained the same, so often all the complaints against this person are repeated in the new family.

   In addition, a rather big surprise can be expected from memory, which most often brings to the fore only something good and pleasant: coffee on a Sunday morning, a huge birthday cake, walking together, rescuing a kitten abandoned by someone... And it is these memories prevent you from starting a normal life with another woman.

   But that’s not all: now everyday life in its most varied manifestations is entering the arena. There are too many (not enough) onions (pepper, salt) in the cutlets; The porridge is not crumbly enough, the shirt was bought from the wrong brand, the stores you should go to are not the ones you are used to...

   Thus, it turns out that it is quite likely that there will be a desire to return to the “ex”, which, whatever one may say, today seems to be a more comfortable option.

5. The fifth reason is the “re-discounting” of values. Sometimes men leave the family for completely unmanly reasons - but simply to get rid of some problems, for example, domestic or material ones.

   Where can one run in this case from a bitchy wife who demands the entire salary, who, to the point of scandals, does not approve of drinking gatherings with supposed friends, wants some kind of repairs... And the man goes to rehabilitation - of course, to his mother.

   Mom immediately begins to rejoice wildly and buys another bottle, reports that all her life she could not stand “this little girl you foolishly married”... And then most mothers cheerfully take all the power into their own hands (more precisely, they had no intention of to let go of power). And the man will either have to come to terms with the role assigned to him by his mother, that is, with the role of a mother’s boy and a henpecked man, or change something... Change his mother? It's even funny to listen to! Change yourself? What for?

   So the thought arises that with my wife, even though my mother doesn’t love her, it wasn’t so bad. And it’s better to visit your mother on weekends (or, even better, only on holidays).

6. The sixth reason is the desire to teach a lesson. Sometimes a man doesn’t like something about his wife: it could be her work schedule, the habit of waking her up ungodly early on a day off (before two o’clock in the afternoon), constant questions about her salary, the requirement to brush her teeth in the evening... But you never know, any woman has shortcomings ? And it’s quite possible to teach such a slow-witted person a lesson! What is the best and most intelligible way to teach a lesson? That's right, turn around and leave! The wife, of course, will be very scared and will immediately correct herself!

   Well, he left... But the question of whether such a “teacher” can come back may not have a positive answer. Apparently, not all men remember that women very often adhere to the principle “when you leave, go away,” moreover, leaving the family for “educational purposes,” men often forget that their pseudo-education may well turn against them and that they are very they risk being left alone, which hardly anyone would call proud, but stupid, no matter what.

Why do women let men come back?

A broken cup or plate is most often thrown into the trash. And only some especially valuable specimens that have collection value are subject to restoration. But no one uses such exclusive cups, the cracks on which are neatly sealed, for tea drinking, that is, for their intended purpose.

So why do women who know everything about broken cups try to mend cracked or even completely destroyed relationships? Is this reasonable? And it’s even more strange if a woman allows a man to leave the family and return several times.

Probably, many women are afraid to be alone. But is it better to sit and wait by the sea for weather or for the return of your husband, who has galloped away on his next “hunt”?

Some women traditionally explain their permission to return by their difficult financial situation. What can I say? It can only be noted that in the modern world a woman is not so dependent on a man in material terms and that work, especially in a large populated area, can always be found - it all depends on determination and perseverance.

Another reason that women often give is “where would he, poor thing, be without me?” or “he will be lost without me.” But when he left, he was thinking about something?

And you can hear many other reasons, although only one can be considered truly serious - love, and mutual love.

Indeed, anyone can make a mistake; wrong actions happen in the life of any person. And it is very important to correct this mistake in time and never repeat it again. The same applies to a man leaving. If it was a mistake that he admitted and is correcting, that’s one thing, but if it’s promiscuity, selfishness, unwillingness to take others into account, then why does the family need this?

conclusions

Why do men leave and come back? They are not leaving to defend their country from an enemy invasion, but simply to take a break from family responsibilities, to live on their own, to relax...

Because a real man is strength, reliability and confidence in the future, and not endless problems and traveling “back and forth”...

The difficult period of separation is over. Napkins wet from tears were thrown away, empty wine containers moved to the trash container, all the advice of girlfriends was listened to and taken into account. Life gets better, sometimes a new love appears with all the bright colors adopted for this occasion. And here, like a bolt from the blue, is the “return of the prodigal parrot,” and precisely when (as a rule) the woman no longer needs it. Why do men come back after a breakup? Let’s try to figure out the psychology of return, what it consists of.

Psychologists have identified several situations in which a man tends to return to his former passion after a breakup. And it doesn’t depend on who he left: a gray mouse or a successful beauty, it’s all about his own internal psychology, his ego, his life preferences.

Why such situations occur can only be said approximately; the psychology of separations and returns has been studied quite well, but a person is not a soulless mechanism; each specific case has its own nuances and a man’s own motives for why he should return.

• Nobody loves Me

The psychology of any person is such that he needs love. What can I say, monotony in life is equally boring for both men and women, but due to natural egocentrism, the stronger sex can simply turn around and leave; their sense of responsibility is much less pronounced than that of women. But why do men come back again after a breakup? The psychology of this behavior is as follows: they compared, had a walk, and realized that they were in a hurry to leave. The novelty of feelings has become boring, bright masks have been torn off, and it turns out that the previous relationship was better, “more convenient.” Very often, experienced married men who are seduced by the beauty and youth of their new partner fall into this trap and happily change their “old” wife. But here an unpleasant surprise awaits them: the young passion is in no hurry to arrange a “heavenly life” with a cozy life, clean shirts and delicious lunches and dinners, but the man is so used to them. And when he gets tired of “physics”, he returns.

• “Game” is not shared with rivals

Oddly enough, the “legs” of the next reason why a man returns after a breakup grow from primitive instincts. The psychology of this is seen in the animal world, where jealousy and possessiveness rule the world. A modern man, leaving a woman, is one hundred percent sure that she must suffer and yearn for him for the rest of her life and, God forbid, start a new romance.

Very often, jealousy and the presence of new fans from his ex-wife becomes a compelling reason for a man to return.

Having learned that a rival has taken the “holy place,” the man immediately returns after parting to “drive away the stranger” and bring some sense into his former passion. Therefore, if a man who left once again began calling and looking for meetings, think: this could be banal jealousy. Having driven off his opponent, he will again leave his native land, and this will always be the case.

• As an experiment

If a man leaves, then returns and, having again provoked a separation, disappears, he is simply an egoist, a man who masterfully and with gusto loves to play on the “strings of the soul” of another person. At a young age, such “games” are often started by teenagers who want to establish themselves in a crowd of friends. Then the woman, her feelings and the psychology of relationships in general, the presence or absence of rivals, her position in society and material status are indifferent. He wants proof of power over a woman, limitless and absolute! He can methodically ruin the life (sometimes with a fatal outcome) of a woman and calmly switch to another, and, oh God, he doesn’t feel any remorse. This murderous psychology is an experiment, nothing more.

• Naive like a child

This psychology of return is characteristic, first of all, of aging men who, having lived their entire lives with one woman, naively believe that the “unearthly nymph” they met along the way is interested exclusively in his gout, intellectual and physical impotence, belching, brightly shiny bald head, but not with a wallet. And when an epiphany comes to them, such men return after the separation they themselves provoked and try to reason with the spouse who is pushing them back to the “nymph”: “how can you, we have grandchildren.”

• Harmony in sex

Harmony in relationships is the key to a strong family.

Do not forget that sexual relations in the family come first for a man. And when he does not receive proper release, he leaves. The reasons why this happens are different: the wife’s pregnancy, her constant fatigue, illness and much more. But if, in addition to sex, the couple had a harmonious emotional relationship, he, having received what he wanted on the side, returns after breaking up. Psychologically, this can be explained simply - physically he “nourished” himself, but emotionally there was emptiness. And he, trying to fill the gap, returns after parting as if nothing had happened.

• Call of Duty

Sometimes men return after a breakup out of a sense of duty, due to a series of serious problems that have arisen for the “abandoned woman.” Psychologically, there is no smell of love here; the man only has a developed innate sense of responsibility towards his former passion or children.

• Love for children

Children deter not only women, but also men from making the final decision to leave the family.

In some cases, men return after separation because they cannot imagine that their children will be raised by another man. Or the children themselves ask to return. Relationships between adults in this case can be built according to different scenarios, but the basis for return is sincere love for children.

• Lifelong binges

It happens that men who have already created a new family return after separation because they began to miss their former wife, who over the years has become a loved one. In a new relationship, everything seems normal, but foreign. Psychologists say that such “binges” can last a lifetime and take the form of “life for two families.”

• And you are beautiful again

Of course, no one will argue that everyday life and family leave an imprint on a woman’s appearance, and sometimes not the most attractive one. A man, going outside, is looking for a beautiful object of adoration, and this is normal. But in the case when an abandoned woman realizes the reason for her lover’s departure and quickly puts herself in order, he, dumbfounded by her new unusual image, returns back after the breakup. What bothered him was fixed, and he already liked everything else.

• Every breath makes you drunk

Oddly enough, but sometimes the question of why a man returns after a breakup can be answered: love. Yes, yes, he left the woman he loved, but only in order to understand and realize: he needs her. Perhaps he was comparing, perhaps he was simply alone and, having sorted everything out, decided to return.

What to do?

According to psychologists, a man sees a woman losing her youthful attractiveness and growing old, but in no case does he realize that he has also aged. Next to his 40-50 year old wife, he feels like the same boy of 20-25 years old. When (after leaving) insight comes, the men return.

What should a woman do, how to understand the psychology of separation and timely separate the wheat from the chaff? Probably the best thing is not to make hasty decisions (it’s he who has returned, this is his return), so it’s worth taking a closer look and checking the sincerity of intentions. There is no need to idealize the situation; as practice shows, “return syndrome” is more often a disease of infantile men than a completely conscious choice of a strong husband.