Technique of anchoring on a woman. Top secret: methods of influencing men

Neurolinguistic programming in modern psychotherapy is one of the most popular methods of influencing the human psyche. It is used in almost all aspects of life.

Effective NLP techniques in love can be used by both women and men. They help create new or improve existing relationships. According to E. Berger, author of the famous book “NLP for Happy Love,” how the romance will end and how it will develop depends directly on the person himself, his aspirations and desires.

Crazy love passes quickly, but the love of two crazy people never!
Angelina Jolie

Effective NLP methods

There are general techniques in NLP that are intended for use in various areas of life. They are also suitable for improving your personal life.

"Adjustment"

Among the most popular techniques are "Adjustment". This method is effective for establishing closer contact with the interlocutor. The technique involves copying the partner’s behavior, his gestures, facial expressions and even his breathing rhythm. This is the so-called “external” adjustment, which should be done as naturally as possible.

After establishing contact, you can move on to “leading”. To do this, you need to smile, and the interlocutor will repeat the action. If you become serious, then after a while the partner to whom you have adjusted will also move into this state. Adjusting to values ​​is no less effective. To find a common language with a partner of the opposite sex, you should try to look at the world through his eyes, through his belief system.

"Anchoring"

Almost any seduction technique in NLP involves the reception "Anchoring". This technique is based on the positive emotions and feelings that the partner experienced at a certain moment. In order to direct them towards oneself, one should create an environment similar to that which surrounded him at the moment of pleasure.
Moreover, it is not at all necessary that the atmosphere fully correspond to the person’s memories. Sometimes smells, music, and touch act as “anchors.” They are associated with previous relationships or just a pleasant pastime. You can make “anchors” yourself. One of the algorithms for installing them is as follows:

• You need to win your partner over, using techniques of mirroring, joining, adjusting, etc.
• When the man is in a relaxed state, you can ask him about his favorite holidays. You should ask him to describe in detail how the event went and how he felt.
  Important! He should not have any negative emotions associated with the holiday that the partner remembered.
• When a man’s condition reaches climax, which can be monitored by external signs (breathing, skin color, movement of facial muscles, etc.), you need to gently touch any part of his body (back of the head, neck, shoulder, etc.). This action will install the tactile anchor.
• After this, you will need to change the topic of conversation and return the man to his normal state.

Next you need to check how the anchor works. To do this, you will need to repeat the touch and look at the man’s condition. If everything was done correctly, then after an unconditional signal the joyful mood and euphoria associated with the feeling of the holiday that he was describing will return to him.

"Mirroring", "Attachment"

"Mirroring" And "Joining", in essence, are similar to “Adjustment”. This is the adoption of a pose, repetition of facial expressions, gestures of the interlocutor, which contributes to the emergence of trust and sympathy on the part of the interlocutor.

"Positive reinforcement"

A person experiences various emotions that reflect his attitude to any event. Reinforcement is a kind of encouragement for behavior. This method is used for training animals, but it is also effective for humans. The following are used as positive reinforcement of other people's behavior:

• smile;
• attention;
• agreement;
• praise;
• positive “anchor”, etc.

"Positive reinforcement" can also be considered a manipulation technique. This technique helps to teach a person some skills and correct his behavior. For example, if your partner talks about something too emotionally, then at this moment you should frown and shake your head slightly. Once he returns to a calm tone, show your approval by smiling and showing positivity. Over time, a person will intuitively guess what style of communication to follow.

NLP techniques for women

Women who want to arrange their personal lives can turn to the book written by Eva Berger, “NLP for Happy Love.” The author not only describes techniques and techniques, but also gives practical exercises aimed at understanding your problems in search of the ideal man. In her book, we can note several effective techniques with which girls can start new relationships or improve existing ones:

1. "Perfect Date". When meeting a guy for the first time, almost every girl experiences awkwardness and tension. These emotions lead to the fact that the date leaves an unpleasant aftertaste for both parties. To exclude such a development of events, psychological preparation for the meeting is necessary. The girl is recommended to visualize the image of an ideal date, think it through to the smallest detail, foresee possible troubles and ways to overcome them.
2. "Rule of three yeses" Can be used with anyone. At the same time, men are more prone to stereotypical actions, which is what this technique is based on. A person who answers positively to three questions in a row will do so a fourth time. The technique can be used to push a man to a new stage of a relationship (cohabitation, wedding, etc.). The most important phrase should be spoken not in a questioning tone, but in an affirmative tone with confidence in the voice.
3. "The right motivation" is a method that will allow relationships to exist and develop. If a woman can give a positive attitude, then the man will be interested in continuing the romance.
4. Among other methods, it stands out "Disarming", representing proactive action. This technique is effective if the relationship is on the verge of breaking down. The technique is to anticipate the partner’s actions. A phrase such as “I understand that our relationship is not ideal, and we may break up, but I would really like to try to correct previous mistakes and get a second chance,” may well help avoid a breakup.

   When using Disarm, the woman says what her partner wanted to say. Accordingly, the meaning of repeating her words is lost, and there is a high probability that the relationship will continue. But their duration will depend only on the further actions of the couple.

5. That is what NLP offers in various techniques. Among the effective techniques is noted "Breaking the stereotype". This method is suitable for attracting the attention of the desired object, standing out among other fans.

NLP techniques for men

Not only girls, but also men can use techniques that allow them to quickly conquer their chosen one. Effective techniques for manipulating consciousness are used in practice and have repeatedly confirmed their effectiveness. Men who want to master the initial skills of seducing representatives of the opposite sex can pay attention to the following methods:

• "The Illusion of Choice";
• "Plus or Minus";
• "Rule of one consent";
• "Choice without choice."

Let's look at each of these techniques:

1. "The Illusion of Choice": Thanks to NLP techniques, it is possible to create the illusion in a girl that she herself chooses one or another scenario. The essence of the technique is quite simple: it uses “closed-type” questions. In other words, the answer to it is already contained in the question itself. For example: “Where do you prefer to go, to the cinema or to a cafe?” In this case, not every lady will decide to offer the third option.

   The main thing to remember when using this method is that both choices must be beneficial for the man. Another option for using the technique is that one of the answers in the question must initially be negative so that the girl does not choose it. So, the phrase can be constructed as follows: “The weather is wonderful today. Do you want to sit in this stuffy cafe or would it be better to take a walk in the fresh air?”

2. Reception "Plus-minus" is built on the contrast of experienced emotions. A positive response will be more powerful if you create a negative response first (but don’t make it too much worse). For example, on a date you can give a compliment to another girl, which will be a “minus”. But the mistake is immediately corrected with pleasant words to his partner, which is counted as a “plus”. Moreover, the latter should cause a stronger emotional reaction.
3. "One Consent Rule" can be included not only in the techniques of seducing men, but also women. This technique is similar to the “Three Yes” technique. However, it can be difficult to get several positive answers from a girl at once, so sometimes it’s enough to stop at one. The essence of the technique is that a proposal is made, after which a question is asked. If the lady answers positively, then most likely she will agree with the first statement.

   For example, an invitation to a date might sound like this: “Let's meet and go to the movies. Do you like comedies? Regardless of whether the partner answers positively or negatively, she has subconsciously already agreed with the first proposal. The phrases can be swapped, first a question, then a statement. But this is typical for men who are not completely confident in themselves and prefer to adapt to the desires of their partners.

4. "Choice Without Choice" operates on a similar principle. The woman is offered a free choice from the only possible option. For example, when making a date, the phrase is formulated as follows: “When are you free, tomorrow or the day after tomorrow?” So, it is initially assumed that the meeting will take place. But the partner has the illusion that the choice is hers.

   Using an inferiority complex in a relationship between a woman and a man can bring good benefits to the latter. But this method should be used as carefully as possible so as not to achieve the opposite effect. The essence of the game with complexes is as follows. In the presence of a lady, you should start admiring another girl:
   At the same time, if the lady is short, then you need to talk about how good tall women look. If the girl is thin, then you can admire the fair sex, who are prone to being overweight. This awakens in women the desire to prove the opposite. They are ready to show a man that they are no worse than their rivals, who have opposite qualities.

   As an example, we can cite the story of one bachelor whose apartment was always clean, but he himself did not make any effort to do so. When he brought women to visit, he did not ask them to do anything. He just started talking about how one of the purposes of girls is to create cleanliness and comfort. At the same time, he noted that a real woman could never tolerate a mess. After that, his guests themselves took cleaning products into their hands to show their best side, not suspecting that they were just being manipulated.

Techniques for everyone

In NLP there are techniques for women and men, and there are techniques that are successfully used by representatives of both sexes. Do not assume that manipulation techniques are very simple. In order to master them perfectly, you will need to make a lot of effort. However, the result will not take long to arrive. After all, to become happy, to have success with the opposite sex, to improve existing relationships - this is what most of those who want to master NLP techniques in love strive for.

Any human activity in the modern world, if it is aimed at developing oneself and improving life, is a constant desire to hone skills, increase efficiency and effectiveness, etc. And a huge role in this process is played by such things as motivation, emotional states, as well as features of nervous and mental processes. What does NLP have to do with it? Few people know that today’s popular methods of increasing personal productivity have their roots in neuro-linguistic programming. This topic is the subject of this lesson “Anchoring, Effectiveness and State Management”.

From this lesson you will learn about unique techniques used in psychology and NLP, and aimed at improving a person’s personal characteristics. These techniques include working with states, recognizing thought traps, the SMART technique, anchoring and some other techniques. They are also interesting because they can be successfully used by people of completely different categories: men, women, teenagers, businessmen, housewives, managers, performers, etc. That is why the material in this lesson will be of interest to everyone who is engaged in self-development and is determined to improve their lives.

Efficiency

Starting this section, it should be said that effectiveness in life, first of all, implies a person’s ability to communicate with others, i.e. This refers specifically to a person’s skills as a communicator. And the founders of NLP, in their research, noted that all the best communicators have something in common - these are three special qualities that make any communication as effective as possible.

Three qualities of master communicators

1. Any successful communicator clearly defines the direction of his communication and sets himself specific goals that need to be achieved through communication.
2. Well-developed sensory acuity allows a successful communicator to always be in a state of presence, identify characteristic behavioral reactions of others and receive feedback on the effectiveness of his communication.
3. A successful communicator has excellent behavioral flexibility, which allows him to always be able to change his behavior and adapt it for more productive communication.

But if we have already talked about sensory acuity and flexibility of behavior in previous lessons, then we must consider the issue of defining goals in more detail. One of the most effective techniques for setting communication goals is the SMART technique.

SMART technology

The word “smart” itself is translated from English as “smart”, “intelligent”. Setting goals using the SMART technique implies several main points contained in the acronym itself:

• S - Specific
• M - Measurable
• A - Attainable
• R - Realistic
• T - Timeable

Clear goal setting is the most important condition for achieving success in any field of activity. But, unfortunately, 95% of all people, even knowing this, do not do this, and all their efforts are aimed at realizing the goals of the remaining 5%.

It is the SMART technique that makes it possible not only to set goals, but to develop a detailed action plan to achieve them, the main feature of which is precisely the definition of the desired specific results. After all, it is their formulation that answers many of the questions that characterize any plans to achieve something, and significantly increases the chances of successful implementation.

The uniqueness of the SMART technique also lies in the fact that thanks to it a person concentrates his attention on all external and internal resources that influence the achievement of results, which, in turn, contributes to the most appropriate representation of everything that is happening and allows you to instantly record any changes in what is happening. a person perceives. Then the human consciousness activates all the necessary resources (skills, abilities, abilities) to achieve what is intended and the person can extract maximum benefit from absolutely everything around him that is available to him at the present moment in time.

Of course, this is just a brief and introductory information about the SMART technique. You can learn more about this technique here.

Now we should talk about another important component of effectiveness - the principles of a well-formulated result. There are seven of them in total.

7 principles of a well-formulated result

Knowing the importance of a well-formulated result, we can identify the basic principles that it must comply with.

1. Positive wording

A result formulated in a positive way has a much greater motivating effect on a person than one formulated negatively. This is facilitated by the fact that the human subconscious always discards any particles of “not” in statements. The formulation of the result should describe exactly what we want to achieve, and not what we want to avoid or get rid of. Also, you should not formulate using negatives. Simply put, if you want to get rid of the habit of eating a lot of sweets, then you should not say to yourself: “I plan to stop eating sweets,” but you should say, for example: “I am starting to take care of my health and eat only healthy foods.” The fact is that by pronouncing a positively formulated result to himself, a person forms in his mind a certain vision of himself having already achieved this result. And this vision will greatly contribute to ensuring that the required result is achieved, because... appropriate messages will be sent to the nervous system.

In order to formulate the result in a positive way, it is necessary to ask yourself special questions when formulating: QUESTIONS: “What exactly do I want?”, “Did I formulate the result in a positive way?”, “What will achieving this result give me?”, “How Do I see myself having already achieved this result?

2. Sensory description

After the result is correctly formulated, you need to try to understand your feelings associated with its achievement. Sensory sensations (sounds, pictures, etc.) confirm the achievement of the result and create its map, i.e. reflect everything that we will experience when we achieve what we want. They operate at the level of the nervous system and send special signals to our mind. And this will become a fundamental factor in determining our internal state, which forms the necessary behavior through which we will achieve our goals.

To carry out a correct sensory description, you need to ask yourself the following questions: “How will I understand that I have achieved the desired result?”, “What will I see after achieving the result?”, “What will I hear after achieving the result?”, “What will I feel?” after achieving the result?

3. Initiation and control of the result

While our thoughts, reactions and emotions are subject to our own control, we cannot directly influence the thoughts, reactions and emotions of those around us. But there is a way out of this situation - this is an indirect change in other people, carried out through changes in oneself. We can change our own programs in such a way as to prevent others from using their usual programs. A correctly formulated result is in close relationship with those processes that we can contribute to, which we can manage and which we can support.

Questions for initiating and controlling the result: “Is my result connected with someone else?”, “Am I the only one in control of my result and its achievement?”, “Can I evoke certain reactions in others that will help me achieve the desired result?” .

4. Relevant to the context

When formulating a result, it is necessary to take into account that it must correspond to the maximum number of aspects of a person’s life. If we do not take this into account, then the result that we form turns out to be superficial and does not reflect all the features of future changes.

Therefore, when formulating a result, you need to ask questions such as: “Where and when do I need this result?”, “How do I want to get this result?”, “What conditions are needed to obtain the result?”, “What can the achievement of the result influence?” , “Can any problems arise after achieving the result?”

5. Secondary benefit

Any human behavior must be in accordance with positive values ​​and positive results. If it does not meet these requirements, then it should not be supported. In NLP this is called secondary gain. For example, if a person eats a lot of sweets, it means that he receives a certain benefit from it, and if he did not receive it, then he would not eat sweets. Therefore, it turns out that if changes in behavior do not provide a person with alternatives to achieve secondary benefits, then they are likely to not last long.

To discover relevant secondary benefits, you should ask the following questions: “What can I lose by achieving the result I need?”, “Can I give up something important to me in order to get this result?”, “Are there any areas of life that are not affected by the result I received?

6. Resource accounting

To achieve any result, a person needs resources. It follows from this that a correctly formulated result should imply the presence of certain resources that a person can provide himself and make part of the successful implementation of his plan. If a person cannot feel his result, then he has not taken into account the need for resources.

To understand what resources you need, ask yourself: “What do I already have to achieve the desired result?”, “What else might I need to achieve the result?”, “Do I have any similar experience and what am I What can I get out of it?”, “Do I know anyone who has already done what I want to do?”

7. Environmental friendliness of the result in the context of the whole system

Considering that NLP, as a science of human interaction with the outside world, implies maximum consistency, changes in any indicators of the human system must be synchronized with other parts of the overall system and be in harmony with them. In other words, when formulating the result, a person must take into account not only himself, but also other people. And if the benefit is received at the expense of something else, then it will not be preserved.

To accurately determine the environmental friendliness of a result, you should ask yourself the following four questions: “What will happen if I achieve the result?”, “What will not happen if I achieve the result?”, “What will happen if I do not achieve the result?”, “What will not happen?” what will happen if I don’t achieve the result?”

To summarize the section on effectiveness, it can be noted that maximum compliance with all the above criteria is a guarantee that any changes (no matter what area of ​​life they concern) will occur successfully and will have a positive impact on what they are aimed at, including a person’s interaction not only with with his inner world, but also with the outside world and the people around him.

The next important technique in NLP that you should pay special attention to is anchoring.

Anchoring in NLP

Anchoring in NLP is a natural process where one element of an experience recreates the entire gamut of experiences associated with it. In fact, this process is an integral part of human life, but it occurs subconsciously and usually goes unnoticed. It is for this reason that anchoring is a very powerful technique if you learn to use it correctly.

Anchors also need to be mentioned separately. The word “anchor” in NLP refers to any external or internal representation that contributes to the reproduction of another. The life of any person is filled with anchors and they can be recognized in absolutely everything, and NLP shows how to do this. Moreover, conscious anchoring can serve for the benefit of a person, identifying the best facets of the personality and creating the prerequisites for the development of new ideas and making new decisions.

The first thing to consider when talking about anchoring is the concept of stimulus response.

Stimulus-response concept

This relationship itself was first discovered by the Soviet scientist Ivan Pavlov, who was studying the reflexes of dogs. In his experiments, he discovered that dogs salivated when they saw, smelled, or tasted meat. Offering meat to the dogs, he began to accompany this process with the sound of a bell. After some period of such practice, salivation in dogs began to be caused by the mere sound of a bell, i.e. it was the sound that became the anchor.

The development of reflexes in people, in most cases, requires a certain amount of combination of the stimulus itself and its reinforcement, because the desired response is reinforced through systematic positive confirmation. So, for example, this confirmation can be expressed in praise, approval, a friendly handshake, etc. And it must be repeated until the desired reaction is established. On average, the consolidation process takes 25-30 days, after which the reaction becomes automatic and reflexive.

EXAMPLE: If a person wants to quit smoking, he must associate his incentive to smoke with a certain reaction that smoking a cigarette causes in him, and replace it. The stimulus is usually considered to be the desire to relax and get distracted. Consequently, the reaction to stress or long work is the desire to smoke. Those. cigarettes are an anchor. To get rid of it, you need to replace it with something else, for example, five minutes of relaxation with your eyes closed and thoughts about something good. The practice of changing the anchor from negative to positive over the course of a month will replace the connection of relaxation and rest with a cigarette with the connection of relaxation and rest with closing your eyes and thinking about good things.

As for anchoring itself, it differs from the “stimulus-response” concept in that it allows you to set up a connection in one attempt. Communication between people is characterized by the fact that during it people always perform anchoring, using words as well as visual/sound signals to convey information, evoke emotions, memories, etc. This process is called verbal anchoring. And the anchors themselves can be of several types. They can be used either individually or in combinations.

Types of anchors

• Visual - what a person can see (gestures, facial expressions, postures).
• Auditory - what a person can hear (words spoken in a certain way, names, music).
• Kinesthetic - what a person can feel physically (touch).
• Olfactory - anchors to smell.
• Gustatory - anchors to taste.
• Spatial - includes all of the above and connects the emotional state of a person and the space in which he is located.
• Sliding - increase the intensity of one specific state.

The anchoring process is based on four principles.

Principles of anchoring

As already mentioned, anchoring, unlike the stimulus-response principle, can occur on the first try, and the anchoring can persist for many years.

The first principle: uniqueness. When setting an anchor, you need to choose a unique stimulus, i.e. a stimulus that is not used frequently in everyday life. For example, an ordinary handshake cannot be called a unique stimulus, but some unusual touch that a person will immediately notice can be.

Second principle: intensity. You need to install an anchor precisely at the moment of greatest intensity of the experience. This will allow the anchor to be associated with this state. But here it is important to include your sensory acuity, because... The intensity of experiencing states may vary among people.

Third principle: purity. It is necessary that the anchor be separate from everything else and have no “competitors”, i.e. did not cause the person to experience any other states, emotions or thoughts. Purity in this context presupposes precisely the uniqueness of the evoked experience.

Fourth principle: time accuracy. When installing an anchor, you should choose the moment very carefully - the state in which the person is must be extremely intense so that the anchor hits the very point. It is also important to know that if the state is declining, then the anchor should be removed so as not to anchor the declining state.

By methodically and technically applying anchoring methods, you can learn to instantly evoke or change certain emotional states in people (and even yourself), thereby more accurately understanding others (and yourself) and improving your interactions with them (and yourself).

But a successful communicator must know not only how to anchor a person and evoke certain experiences in him, but also be able to work with emotional states. We will talk about this in the following section.

Working with states

State is how a person feels in the world; a physiological phenomenon that is influenced by a person's emotions and way of thinking. Whenever a person experiences something internally, it is expressed externally in the characteristics of his behavior and state. Conditions may vary in duration, intensity of experiences and degree of awareness. You also need to know that a calm state contributes to a more harmonious thinking process, and the most intense, on the contrary, complicates it and takes away more energy. Also, all states are distinguished by individual emotions, which, in most cases, are described using kinesthetic terms. Human conditions change constantly. But he cannot be in the same state all day. Any good states are always replaced by not very good ones, but bad states are always replaced by good ones.

It is important to note that, despite the fact that conditions are usually caused by external factors that we seem to have no control over, in reality we create them ourselves. And one of the main features of NLP is that it allows you to develop the ability to influence your own states and the states of others.

Conditions and abilities

In addition, conditions have a direct impact on a person’s abilities. For example, a student may be excellent at rehearsing a presentation while at home alone, but as soon as he goes out in public, everything he has rehearsed will lose all meaning if he is overcome by fear of public speaking. Any of our abilities can increase or decrease depending on our states. This includes the ability to learn, the ability to speak in public, efficiency, etc. Whenever you are faced with a task or need to do some work, ask yourself one fundamental question that will set the pace for all subsequent activities: “What state should I be in to cope with this quickly and easily?”

Along with this, each person should have an idea of ​​his key state - the state in which he finds himself the vast majority of the time. It is the main prerequisite for any human action in the everyday world. Moreover, it should not always be the most effective or productive, but, in any case, it is the most familiar to a person.

It is worth adding here that the key state is often laid down in childhood, and over time it becomes such a familiar combination of sensations, thoughts, experiences and feelings that a person begins to feel that the course of action that implies his key state is the only option. But as soon as a person realizes his key state and, in general, that he has it, he has the opportunity to evaluate this state from a critical point of view and understand: is it effective, does it suit him, can it be replaced with a better one, and is it necessary? should I do this?

How can a person describe his internal states and the differences between them? To do this, associations and dissociations are used.

Associations and dissociations

Associations and dissociations are two ways in which a person can perceive the world. The difference between them is that sometimes a person feels completely involved in events, and sometimes he perceives them from the position of an observer. By associating, a person feels based on direct experience, and when dissociating, he feels by thinking about this experience.

A person associates when:

• Is in a state of “here and now”;
• Absorbed in the process of what he is doing;
• Perceives what is happening from the first position;
• Experiences a range of sensations in his own body.

Associations are effective for:

• Getting pleasure from life;
• Enjoying memories;
• Application of knowledge and skills in practice;
• Concentration.

A person dissociates when:

• Thinks about action;
• Detached from what he is doing;
• Evaluates himself from the outside;
• Feels the passage of time;
• Detached from physical sensations.

Dissociations are effective for:

• Analysis of the experience gained;
• Learning from life experience;
• Controlling the passage of time;
• Retreat from situations that pose a potential or direct threat.

Another important skill is the ability to change states.

Changing states

The skill of changing states and the ability to independently choose your feelings are the most important condition for gaining personal freedom and a happy life. But you need to understand that this personal freedom does not mean that a person will never experience negative emotions again, but he will be able to clearly recognize them and correct his reaction. And one should not consider negative states as something bad, because... they are an integral part of any person's life.

Any state is related to the way we think. Although some people make a distinction between body and mind, they are actually one system. And emotional states, in turn, are associated with many processes: mental, physiological, neurochemical, etc. And a change in one component entails a change in the entire system.

Here's one good tip: if you notice that you are in a negative state, try to perceive it without judgment - as a simple natural process. If you start beating yourself up and telling yourself that you shouldn’t experience this, reproaching yourself for it, you will make it even worse for yourself. Being in negative states, of course, is not very good, but blaming yourself for it is even worse. Realize your condition - this is the road to change. Realize the possibility of choice - your condition can be changed. And there is more than one practical way for this: the condition can be changed at the physiological level, or at the mental level.

Below we provide a brief description of state changing methods.

Interrupt. An interruption is the process of leaving a negative state and transitioning to a neutral one. It is very effective when you need to remove yourself or another person from an acute negative state.

EXAMPLES: Telling a joke or story, increasing physical activity, visual, auditory, kinesthetic distraction. This is necessary so that a person’s attention and concentration on a negative state is interrupted, thereby creating the ground for the emergence of a new state.

Resource anchoring. Resource anchoring involves the intentional creation of an anchor that will help you get out of a negative state and enter a positive and more effective one. The resource that will serve as an anchor depends on the specifics of the situation. The anchoring itself can be caused physically or mentally. It's better to use both directions.

EXAMPLES: Changing the way of thinking, changing the physiological state, turning on music, changing the interior, telling a story or joke, showing certain gestures, saying phrases or pronouncing words in a special tone, touching.

It is important to know that the intensity of the condition affects the effectiveness of the anchor. The anchor itself must meet all the requirements that we discussed above. Once the anchor is established, it must be tested by observing the person's (or your own) reaction and changes in behavior.

Application of chain, stack and collapsing anchors. In cases where the previous techniques do not work or the difference between the current state and the required one is very large, chain, stack and collapsing anchors are used.

• Chain anchors involve guiding a person through a chain of states.
• Stacked anchors involve connecting multiple states onto a single anchor.
• Collapsed anchors are the process of using two different anchors to create one state out of two.

EXAMPLES: Changing the decor in the room and turning on relaxing music, remembering joyful moments and slowing down your breathing, telling an interesting story and a friendly touch, tracking your state and identifying associations, etc.

During the day, a person always moves from one state to another. And quite often, one anchor is not enough to change a negative state. This is where you need to use chain, stack and collapsing anchors. But you must always ensure that chains of anchors do not lead to other negative states. This is the only way to determine the most effective sequence and give it the right direction. You should not neglect your imagination - you can create your own sequences and chains.

Updating the past. Renewing the past is the process of changing ingrained limiting beliefs and behaviors. Most often, this technique is used when a problem that needs to be solved extends from the past.

EXAMPLE: Identifying events that happened in the past and have an impact on the present; establishing feelings caused by events from the past and assessing their impact on the present; identification of behavior that was rooted in the past and manifests itself in the present; identifying patterns and stereotypes that appeared in the past and became entrenched in consciousness, and changing them, etc.

Of course, the techniques for changing states that we have considered include a much larger number of nuances and features, but their description requires writing a separate series of articles. Here we show only the opportunity to learn to influence your states and the states of others, using knowledge about the basic methods of changing them. Try to practice this at your leisure, trying to influence yourself or someone around you, using the simplest basics we have described, and you will see that they are very effective.

And in the final part of our lesson, we will talk a little about what strategies and modeling are in NLP.

Strategies and Simulation

A strategy in NLP is a special manner of behavior designed to achieve the desired result. Strategies belong to the sphere of internal representations and include both the person’s ideas themselves and the desired results. A person always applies strategies, thinking and planning any of his activities.

Strategies consist of the following main components:

• results
• Presentation systems
• Submodalities of representation systems

In order to obtain the desired result, you need to know both the representation systems themselves and their features. But, besides this, knowledge of the sequence of application of all components is no less important. Formation of strategies is a very fast process and very often occurs unconsciously. And the same strategies can be applied in completely different areas. For example, a strategy for behavior in a conflict situation can be applied both in a dispute with a work colleague and when communicating with a hooligan on the street.

Strategies fall into five main categories:

• Decision-making strategies (how a person makes decisions);
• Motivation strategies (how a person motivates his actions and actions);
• Reality strategies (how a person defines reality and forms his beliefs);
• Learning strategies (how a person assimilates the knowledge he receives);
• Memory strategies (how a person remembers).

Any differences between people are due to differences in their strategies. In addition, strategies and their changes always lead to global changes in a person’s life. In addition, strategies are something that works absolutely always and everywhere.

Applying Strategies

Competent work with strategies, as already mentioned, entails powerful changes, tangible both for the person himself and for his environment. Changing strategies means changing reactions, and, consequently, ways of behavior and the results obtained.

Strategies can be applied:

• In training - to improve process efficiency
• Toward motivation - to find the best ways to motivate
• In sales - to increase sales volumes
• In decision making - to increase personal productivity
• To health - to improve the condition of the body
• In therapy - to save people from many problems
• Towards beliefs - to form more constructive beliefs
• In many other areas of life

Speaking about NLP, it should be noted that any NLP techniques are strategies. And the strategies themselves are formed according to a special principle called ADAV. We also need to say a few words about this modeling technique.

Modeling strategies and the ADAV principle

ADAV is the main template by which strategies are modeled in NLP. The abbreviation ADAV means:

• A - Analysis
• D - Action
• A - Analysis
• B - Exit

This means that modeling any strategy begins with the need to analyze the required result and everything connected with it, i.e. comparing the current state with the one that needs to be achieved and determining the difference between them. Next, actions are taken to reduce this difference. After this, the resulting state is analyzed and the differences between what was and what has become are assessed. If the desired result is achieved, and there are no more differences between what was required to be achieved and the current state, then you can exit. If differences remain, then the strategy should be reconsidered and modeled again.

Always using the ADAV technique. You need to ask yourself fundamental questions: “What am I trying to achieve? What result?”, “What should I do for the result to be achieved? What actions does achieving a new state require?”, “Have I achieved what I wanted? Did I do everything I needed to? Is there any difference left between what I wanted and what I currently have?

Only asking such questions and accurate answers to them will make any strategy as effective as possible and capable of producing results. And the ADAV principle is the best solution for this.

In conclusion of the article itself, I would like to say once again that techniques for increasing performance, working with conditions, using and modeling strategies are the key to recognizing many programs that negatively affect a person’s life, changing them and replacing them with others - effective, practical and improving the life of a person and his interaction with the outside world and the people in it. Apply them, implement them into your life and enjoy it.

Test your knowledge

If you want to test your knowledge on the topic of this lesson, you can take a short test consisting of several questions. For each question, only 1 option can be correct. After you select one of the options, the system automatically moves on to the next question. The points you receive are affected by the correctness of your answers and the time spent on completion. Please note that the questions are different each time and the options are mixed.

HOW MAKE A MAN FALL IN LOVE WITH YOU

Every woman wants to know the recipe How to make a man fall in love with you and live happily ever after with him. Of course, there are some recommendations that I will now outline. The influences will be described first as basic, then as prohibited and manipulative.

20 effective techniques

HOW TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A MAN

SECRET #1. SEX APPEAL

Sex appeal. I won't surprise anyone if I say that a sexually attractive woman is more likely to get attention from men. At a minimum, she is guaranteed initial attraction on His part. But this is not all, and only with the help of this it is unlikely that you will be able to make a man fall in love with you.

SECRET #2. IMAGE

Your image should be different from others. To make a man fall in love with you, at least come up with some kind of character trait, even if not exactly the “correct” one, but your “trick”. For example, always wear a “lucky” scarf, keychain, or a love for a certain type of candy. Think about how these sweets will take you out of any trouble to a state of happiness.

This needs to be instilled gradually, and when he wants to please you, he will definitely use this knowledge. Just don’t ask for a mink coat at the first meeting, there’s a high chance of missing out on the man)))

SECRET #3. HINTS, IMAGINATION

Hints about one's own sexuality, indirect promises. For example, in passing it’s good to mention that you attended oral sex courses, or do strip plastic surgery, or read an interesting book about sex, or like to watch pornography, etc.

This perfectly turns on male fantasies. His brain will turn on the influence process itself, and don’t be surprised if over time he burns with passion for you. And you don’t have to think about how to make a man fall in love with you, he will fall in love himself!

SECRET #4. HELPLESS

Women's helplessness in simple matters that are easy for him to complete. From giving a hand when leaving steps and opening doors, to advice on technical issues. And in general, it’s convenient to turn on the “fool” and say, you’re so smart, tell me, stupid...

Taking advice is always very beneficial, since you can partially shift responsibility to the adviser. But be careful, men are not so stupid, and this manipulation may not work. But most often it helps to make a man fall in love, so try it!

SECRET #5. FINANCE

Financial independence. Nobody scares men more than freeloaders. Of course, over time he will take on some financial support, but don’t try to sit on his neck right away. Most men, especially the smarter ones, immediately filter out such ladies. But do you need a smart man?

SECRET #6. ANCHORING

Anchoring. This is an NLP technique. When a man feels especially good with you, touch him in a certain place on the body. Often this technique solves the question of how to make a man fall in love with you. Do this several times, in different situations, when you feel most comfortable. It’s just important to place an anchor in a place that is difficult for others to reach, otherwise this anchor will start to work on your work colleagues.

SECRET No. 7. SUPPORT

Psychological support. All people have good and bad moods. And when a person feels bad, he needs support. At such moments he is especially susceptible. First you need to accustom him to the fact that you will always understand and support. And when he gets used to coming to you for this, you can begin gradual soft suggestion.

SECRET No. 8. OUT OF THE EX!

No exes no complaints, men are scared of women's problems. Especially at the beginning. Let him understand that you are doing well without him. And with him it can be even better.

SECRET No. 9. SLIDING

Slipping away. Create a slight lack of communication with you. On a date Not get to the point where you no longer have anything to tell each other. If you have sex, it's better Not stay overnight. He himself must want to wake up with you in the same bed and ask you about it. Not call Not write first only if it’s relevant. And even if he wants to know about your life, create a small obstacle that he must overcome. A man is a hunter, and he is much more excited to catch up with his prey, rather than to take it when she is waiting with loving eyes.

SECRET #10. EMOTIONS

Disappear at the peak of emotions. So that in your absence he thinks more about you. And more unpredictability. He should not know exactly when you will honor him with your attention again.

We have an excellent article about emotions where you will learn how to use this tool correctly, how to recognize a man’s emotions (and these are his real thoughts), and how to develop emotional intelligence. Once you've read this article, come back and follow the EMOTIONS link.

SECRET No. 11. THE POWER OF REFUSAL

Denial of sex. There are no clear recommendations here. If you are Cleopatra herself in sex, and more than one man has not left you on his own, then feel free to show him class and move away. After a while, he will want to repeat it and you can set your own conditions. But if you doubt your abilities, it is better to hold the man a little BEFORE, so that he can come up with a passion for himself and believe in it. But don't overexpose it too much, otherwise you may end up very disappointed.

SECRET No. 12. LITERACY

Sexual literacy, training. It is very useful to improve your sex skills - various trainings, intimate muscle training, dancing. This will never be superfluous and will increase your self-esteem.

SECRET No. 13. ADJUSTMENT

Adjustment. Copy his poses, but within the limits of etiquette and common sense. It is human nature to trust a similar person, so try to become like him in some way.

Competent FLIRT will help you fall in love with a man, at least at the beginning of communication.

SECRET No. 14. MUTUAL LANGUAGE

Conversation in the same language. Based on his phrases, determine his dominant way of perception. There are three of them - visual, auditory and kinesthetic. And introduce a similar expression of your thoughts into your vocabulary. I will cover this topic in a separate article.

SECRET No. 15. COMMON TOPICS

Presence of common topics of conversation. I really hope that you really have something to talk about. And if a man is not your circle and has other interests, then you can fall in love with a man if he is very good... To do this, you will have to find out his interests and get carried away by it yourself. For real, with all the passion. This is one of the main criteria for compatibility, so go for it. Passion goes away, novelty wears off, but common interests remain!

SECRET No. 16. COMFORT

Comfort. If a man feels comfortable with you, he will always return. Find out what he likes most, what he dreams of and try to fulfill it. And be sure to note this. Ask: “Are you happy now?” or a little more indirectly: “You know, I’m happier now than ever. Thank you for being here now.” And even if he didn’t answer anything, this information was deposited in the subconscious, rest assured. Several such sessions - and you are his queen.

SECRET No. 17. SELF-CRITICALITY

Sense of humor, self-criticism. This will add comfort in communication, and will tie the man to you even more strongly.

SECRET No. 18. HUMILITY

Female submission It really excites a man. And even if you hold a high position at work, you need to be obedient and flexible with your man. And even if it's just a game, he will appreciate it. But in our age of female emancipation, variations are possible, and often men become feminine, women masculine. And be sure to evaluate this advice based on the situation. But according to scientific research, unions with male dominance are considered stronger.

SECRET No. 19. FLATTERY

Flattery. Men love flattery and a woman's admiring eyes, but don't overplay it so he doesn't think you're an idiot. Don't forget to praise him. More often!

SECRET No. 20. PROMISE

Promise. Find out what he is missing in the grandiose life plan.

For example, if he dreams of building a house, tell him that as a child you lived in the village with your grandmother, and those were the happiest times. And in general, you dream of a house where there are a lot of flowers, where it’s cozy... That is, in fact, indirectly promise to bring comfort to his house. Or he wants a child. Say: “I want a son from you.” How successfully the singer Natalie found the most desirable words for any man, and the song became a hit!

FORBIDDEN SECRETS OF HOW TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A MAN

Well, here we come to dangerous techniques. , which can also fire against the manipulator. If you decide to make a man fall in love with you at any cost, think carefully about the consequences. All responsibility and all risks will fall on your shoulders. In no case do I undertake to read morals, you just need to be sure that you feel love for the man. And you shouldn’t be afraid to lose, because fear can get in the way.

HERE !

TECHNOLOGY No. 1

Causing jealousy. Since ancient times, the male has been endowed with jealousy. After all, while he is hunting, he does not want his female to be impregnated by another male, and then raise someone else’s offspring. I won’t tell you the scenarios, just a hint of possible infidelity is enough. And the most amorphous men become more active. Don’t go too far, your victim can easily jump off or give you a showdown, after which you yourself can suffer. Swinging relationships are based on this, when partners try to rekindle their former passion.

TECHNOLOGY No. 2

Strong emotional experiences together. Extreme and danger bind people very strongly. for example, a joint parachute jump, or paragliding, or swimming in the night sea - everything unusual and scary is a strong impact. One day, before my eyes, my lover fell from a waterfall. He survived, with minor injuries. But it was as if something had happened in me, and it tied me terribly to him. For 2 years I suffered from a strong attachment, and he escaped with only physical injuries. Therefore, such experiments are very dangerous, and it is not a fact that they will not turn against the instigator.

TECHNOLOGY No. 3

Disappearance. The manipulator's trump card. Requires little preparation. In a conversation, as if by chance, say that you think that true love is worthy of suicide, or that you understand Marilyn Monroe and the fact that she took her own life. Or other nonsense, and if after this statement your man did not run away and put you in an emergency, continue the game.

After a trivial quarrel that you yourself provoke, just turn off your phone for a few days. Disappear from all social networks, etc. It’s nonsense, of course, but if it works, the victim will go crazy within a few days and it won’t be difficult to fall in love with a man. At a minimum, he will think about you for several days, and this will lead to a kind of attachment.

TECHNOLOGY No. 4

Pendulum. The most harmless of all prohibited influences. First, show the man how good, white and fluffy you are. And then, BANG! After his small mistake, you become a terrible bitch. You choose the amplitude of the swing in accordance with the degree of its binding and common sense. Then again good, and again bad. It is important for you not to be afraid of losing him, because a person with a healthy psyche is unlikely to tolerate this. Although, we all have difficulties... maybe this is how you can make a man fall in love.

HOW TO UNDERSTAND THAT A MAN IS IN LOVE?

Falling in love with a man is still half the battle, or even a quarter. It is very important to recognize the signs of a man’s affection in time. A man's look will tell you how he feels about you. And also about his sexual preferences! Follow the link “A MAN’S VIEW” to understand his attitude towards you.

Is everything complicated in a relationship? Want to know everything about your partner? Confused about yourself? That way !

If you have come to this page, you are interested in building harmonious relationships. I have great respect for people who seek and engage in self-knowledge. Have you tried studying physiognomy? This knowledge will help you “read” any person and make the right impression on a man.

Knowing the strengths/weaknesses of a person, you will always influence the right points. By learning to read a man's non-verbal behavior, you will read his thoughts!

Don’t delay, because time is running out... Moreover, you can start now and absolutely free!

STUDY PHYSIOGNOMY, it is the best tool for life!

HOW WILL PHYSIOGNOMY BE USEFUL TO YOU PERSONALLY?

6 reasons to study physiognomy right now:

1. You will know ALL THE SECRETS of people, because the face is always in sight. To do this, you will not need any data about the person - no last name, no first name, no patronymic, no date, no time, no place of birth, no passport details, no details of his current account - NOTHING!

3. You will increase your income by an average of 40%

4. You will build a strong family without wasting time on mistakes

6. You won't need a lie detector

Psychological anchors have been known for a very long time. I think each of the readers has heard at least something about the anchor method. But not everyone knows exactly how to use it in everyday life in order to achieve maximum effect, including especially when communicating with girls. I’ll tell you how to correctly set a psychological anchor, and, no less important, how to remove the NLP anchor.

Theory

Just as important as practice. I'll tell you briefly about where the legs grow from. An anchor in psychology is some connection between events. With its help you can trigger an interesting reaction. With just one touch, the girl will begin to feel something towards you or she will even want sex.
The simplest and most universal anchor, which practically cannot be removed (and there is no reason to) is a kiss. Touching your lips evokes positive emotions, and you can read how to do this correctly in my article. This is exactly what the work of any NLP anchor looks like.

What's amazing is that you can anchor every person. And it can be anywhere, in any area of ​​the senses: audio, visual, kinesthetic. And the installation methods are different. An auditory anchor is provided by any change in voice or music. Visual - with gestures or special facial expressions. Kinesthetic – touch, temperature. Do you already feel how the almost limitless scope of creativity as a pickup artist is beginning to open up before you?

You need to remember that the NLP anchor works best within the modality that is least developed in a particular person. It will be easy for the visual to suggest something through sound, for example. He is not used to receiving the main flow of information through this channel; receiving it will be something truly memorable. If you want versatility, . These anchors work best with everyone. Now let's move on to some characteristics of a proper NLP anchor.

1. A woman's anchoring should occur at the very peak of the emotions she experiences. Imagine your emotional state during one event as a sinusoidal graph. You need to catch the highest point. The closer to this peak the psychological anchor is installed, the brighter the emotion it will evoke after activation.
2. An anchor in psychology must necessarily be a unique action. If it occurs too often, it will lose its value almost instantly. Do you want to get a high probability of triggering? Work with non-obvious movements.
3. When you reproduce the anchor, try to make it as similar to the original as possible. Yes, a good memory will come in handy, so develop one or two models of your behavior. Make eye contact when you anchor. You can check later if it worked. The movement will be similar, it cannot be faked, and there is no point in it.
4. You can strengthen the effect of the anchor in psychology. Just set this anchor whenever the girl is at the peak of positive emotions. This way you will get the most effective tool.
5. Practice several models of anchors and hone your skills. This way your movements will become almost identical, and in the future you will set them automatically.
6. Don't activate the psychological anchor too often. The more you use, the faster it will exhaust its resource of effectiveness.

None of these theoretical aspects can be ignored. The anchor effect in psychology only looks simple. In fact, you need to handle it competently and be able to use it.

Let's practice

Why bother at all, find out what an anchor is in psychology, install it, remove it? It's all about the opposite effect. Let me give you a simple example. Let's say a week ago you recorded an extraordinary surge of positive emotions in a girl after a blowout. Now you want to get this state from the girl again, you just activate the anchor, and that’s it.

Thus, anchoring in psychology was invented with the goal that you would receive the desired state from your interlocutor almost instantly. You get your hands on a very powerful tool that can work years after installation.

On cats

To hone your anchoring skills and in the future not wonder how to anchor a woman, practice it on yourself. The tool is unique in that it even works on you. Even if you consciously set it for yourself and activate it yourself.

Right now, take it and analyze your behavior, your surroundings with things, symbols. Personally, I still associate one song with simply magical sex with one girl. And this was already 5 years ago. And when I hear it, I return to this state of euphoria, even against my will. The anchor was set while I was in bed with her, that's all.

Right now, try to anchor yourself, for example, with a sense of self-confidence. Focus and relax. Stretch your memory and remember a situation, or better yet several, in which you were 100% sure, and it was justified, as practice later showed. Choose the most powerful memory. Remember everything in the smallest detail, how you moved, how your body felt, how other people talked to you, little things, accessories, clothes, just everything. Try to transport yourself to this state, as if you were there now.

When you concentrate, you will completely enter this state, one might say, you will renounce the present, just press forcefully with one hand on the other. Stay in this position for a little longer and gradually return to the present. Congratulations, the magic button on your body has been invented!

But there is a caveat. This anchor will not work right away. It will need to be reinforced several times while you actually feel confident in yourself. After several repetitions of the same movement, in moments of confidence, this state will return to you when you repeat the action and activate the anchor.

Another person is anchored in exactly the same way. Just don't overdo it with effort. This is not necessarily a click. Just an unusual movement or action. A sliding anchor works well, but it is also more difficult to set up, since it is artificial and complex. First, you set the anchor to the initial position with a touch, then with your voice you enter into the state that you need, accompanying all this with movement. At the end you put a point when you reach the desired state. Now you know how to anchor a woman. Use it!

How to remove?

Psychological anchors in relationships are a powerful weapon in your hands. However, some anchors have to be removed if they were set by other people, negative events, etc. This is really not easy to do. Interruption required.

If you are aware of a negative anchor, achieve a state of euphoria and activate it again. And then again and again. Gradually it will be possible to interrupt.

Anchors tend to fade. The period depends on the character and temperament of a particular person. As a rule, the period does not exceed 3 months, but can last for decades if it is extremely powerful and the person is not too impressionable and emotional. Practice and you will succeed sooner or later!

If you want to know even more secrets for seducing girls

Everyone knows what an anchor is. This is this huge iron thing that is thrown from the ship to keep it in place. Moreover, note that two anchors are usually thrown. For what? And so that the ship does not flop around on the waves and currents, ebbs and flows, so that it is stable in the place where it should be. Remember this fact, we will really need it in our game called “seduction.”

A sailor runs up to the bridge of the ship and fearfully reports to the captain:

- Mr. Captain, the anchor has HAPPENED!

“Yes?” the captain says slowly and slowly. - Bad sign.

There are also anchors in communication. When a tornado occurs inside a person - some kind of emotional outburst, a storm, and at the same time some completely insignificant event occurs outside the person - these two things are inexplicably connected and merge. And then one, like a genie from a bottle, summons another.

* When you are hungry and walk past a bakery, smelling the smell of freshly baked buns, what do you do? Yes, yes, slow down and imagine a bright picture of lunch, and gastric juice will begin to secrete intensely.

* When you inhale the scent of a perfume that is very familiar to you (for example, your first love used this perfume), what do you experience? The heart aches tenderly, waves of pleasant memories roll in.

Pavlov also conducted experiments with dogs and came up with the concept of a conditioned reflex. Lights or sound were turned on while the dog was feeding. After some time, the animal began to secrete gastric juice in the presence of light or sound, although there was no food.

A person is a dog for whom one repetition is often enough for some external stimulus to cause a response. Moreover, unlike animals, an external anchor in humans causes not just a physiological reaction, but a whole complex of memories and emotions associated with this anchor. Thus, having set an anchor for some noticeable reaction, we can always cause it by restoring the previously set anchor.

There are anchors

VISUAL

Appearance, color, facial expression, objects, various poses and gestures...

* Let's say you had a bald and mustachioed father, and he constantly punished and shouted. And now you have grown up, come to get a job, meet your boss and understand that it is simply impossible to work with this person: he is too angry. Why did it happen? Right! The boss is bald and mustachioed.

* A hand extended to you automatically causes a response.

* When a girl starts to undress, men experience a huge complex of different physiological reactions.

* Remember, you met your husband at a disco, he invited you to a slow dance and kissed you with the words: “I will definitely marry you.” Many years have passed, and suddenly you hear the same music. What will happen? Your husband’s voice will ring in your memory: “I will definitely marry you,” and you will smile.

* If your loved one in bed always says: “Let's try... Let's try from behind... Let's try on the side... Let's try 69,” then when in a cafe he smiles, flipping through the menu: “Let's try dessert,” you will suddenly feel excited because completely The non-sexual word “let’s try” in its sound design is colored for you with erotic emotions.

KINESTHETIC

In principle, any sensation can be an anchor. Taste, smell, touch.

* For the older generation, the smell of tangerines and pine needles at the same time immediately evokes memories of the New Year! It’s just that back then people ate tangerines once a year – so it stuck.

* If during your partner’s orgasm you squeeze his palms, and then repeat this movement in the dark of the cinema, you will feel how your loved one’s breathing will change.

Staging

Let's try to figure out how it all works during seduction.

Let's start with visual anchors.

First of all, of course, people are anchored by appearance. But since you don’t know what visual anchors the object of seduction has about the appearance, the choice is limited. You need to dress neatly and in accordance with your own style.

Posture, gait, and body movements cause certain reactions in another person on an unconscious level. A relaxed gait, relaxed movements, and calm energy will show that you are a confident, healthy, free person. By the way, ballroom dancing is ideal for developing a free, relaxed gait.

So, gait, movements. Walk with your normal gait. Feel where there are tensions in the body - stiff muscles, unfree movements, stooping, restrained gestures. Strengthen these clamps to the maximum and walk around for a couple of minutes holding them as tightly as possible. Feel, look in the mirror, what you really are, or rather, how others perceive you. Then sharply release the clamps and move as relaxed and free as possible. Stop slouching and hunching. Tell yourself:

– I’m taller, younger, lighter than yesterday...

After all, when you approach someone with a free, relaxed, calm gait, take a confident pose, your chances of seduction will increase significantly.

What other visual anchors matter?

Stand in front of the mirror and evaluate your gestures. What exactly are you showing with your gestures: “I am closed and afraid of communication”, “I accept you for who you are”, “I am timid”... Ask your close friends how they perceive you from the outside and what specific poses and gestures determine this perception. Read books on gestures, non-verbal communication... Start practicing gestures in front of the mirror that would convey to the other person what you want to convey. You need to practice until new gestures become yours and become completely natural. Now check it out on your friends. And if they say you've changed, that's okay.

With the help of facial expressions, we can convey a lot of information to another person. But do we pass it on? Have you noticed how rich facial expressions children have? You can read everything from their faces. Then we grow up, we try not to show our emotions to others: what if they figure us out and understand how we feel now? What a horror! Is it true?

Gradually our faces become masks. And then we wonder: why have we become uninteresting to the opposite sex? Friends? Close ones? Yes, because we are almost dead!

But sometimes you can seduce without words, with just facial expressions and gestures. How? Do a simple exercise. To begin with, make it a rule when you look in the mirror to make faces at yourself for at least a minute. Stretch your facial muscles so that they become alive again.

Next exercise. Take a simple, neutral phrase, such as: “The weather is lovely today, isn’t it?” Looking in the mirror, start saying this phrase with different intonations. Let it sound there:

* tenderness and care;

* delight;

* the beginning of a detective novel;

* doom of a person tired of life;

* greed;

* depression;

* genuine childish joy.

The most important thing is to try to ensure that your facial expressions match the intonation pattern of your statement.

Auditory anchors

What can we use as auditory anchors?

The first thing that comes to mind is music.

Everyone uses a banal seduction technique: they invite a potential partner to their place for a romantic dinner and turn on relaxing, calm music.

However, few people think that all people not only have different tastes, but also different memories. And the music that we really like can cause pain in the soul of the interlocutor: perhaps the girl he loved left him listening to this music, left him with someone else. And here’s a classic of the genre: you turned on the music in anticipation of a good evening and suddenly notice that your counterpart has plunged into a gloomy mood and is frantically getting ready to go home. Rest assured that nothing can be corrected at this moment. You can only escort them home, preferably silently and respectfully.

Of course, you simply must, before playing music, find out your partner’s preferences and tastes, but it’s still unlikely that they will tell you about the reaction to a specific melody (after all, our psyche tries to block negative memories, and careless anchors turn them on).

What to do?

1. If you are a music lover, you probably have some very rare, beautiful music in your collection that your partner has most likely never heard. Ideal if it is ethnic music. Try it!

2. But it’s best to invite the person to choose a disc from your music library. Firstly, you will show respect for his tastes, and secondly, you will protect yourself from a negative anchor.

No matter how varied your speech is (and for a real enelpeer it should be masterfully witty, light, and elegant), try to compile a dictionary of romantic communication with your subject of seduction. Come up with all the affectionate nicknames and names yourself. Be creative. Do not use the banal “baby”, “bunny”, “fish”, “kitten”... Perhaps your ex-husband, coming with traces of someone else’s lipstick on his cheek, said to your current passion:

“Baby, you’re so smart, come up with something.” I just want to sleep, kitten!

Now imagine what associations she has with these gentle words.

So, if you want to be the best, be the first! Compose neologisms and color them in rainbow colors with your smiles and gentle intonations. These seemingly meaningless words will be filled with romantic meaning from your loving voice.

What is a new name for your loved one? Yes, whatever:

- Slipper!

- Equilucent little one!

- Gorozulechka!

- Lulepusechka!

- Whoa, whoa!

Just use soft consonants, vowels and diminutive suffixes.

It goes without saying that you can compile such a dictionary of neologisms only when your relationship has entered a trusting phase. And at the very beginning of the novel, just call the person by NAME. There is nothing more pleasant to our ears than to hear the sound of our name pronounced with awe, delight and tenderness...

A wonderful anchor is to frantically pronounce the name of the one who gives you this orgasm during an orgasm.

Let's talk a little about “hypnotic speech.” This is a unique form of speaking that quickly puts you into a trance. And trance, as you know, is an altered state of consciousness in which there is no criticism. Exactly what we need for quick seduction. In addition, in this state, using only the voice, we can evoke various states in the interlocutor.

Let's try…

1. Speak without negatives. That is, when you invite your partner to immerse themselves in any experience, you will talk about what he should experience, and not what he should not. Everything inside us is only positive. But how often do people, without knowing it, do nasty things to each other? There is nothing more effective at making a loved one nervous than telling him the phrase: “Just don’t worry.” And how often do we say to another person: “Just don’t forget.” So what's going on? Of course, a person forgets.

2. Undefined language. When describing the experiences or actions you want your subject to have, you need to use nonspecific language. That is, you cannot say: “You feel relaxed.” Usually such specific statements cause resistance. In order for your instruction to pass without resistance, you need to speak vaguely: “And now you can feel... some unusual sensations in the lower abdomen... something reminiscent of languor...” Something like this.

3. Change the pace and volume of your speech (compared to normal). Usually we speak in approximately the same rhythm and timbre. And any deviation from the usual stereotype will immediately attract the partner’s attention. Usually, when we want to say something important, we speak louder. But we can achieve the same effect if we say something important quieter, or slower, or change the timbre. It works very well when our speech changes in waves - sometimes louder, sometimes quieter, sometimes in a minor key, then in a major key. The most important messages can be spoken in a whisper. This draws maximum attention to the message and gives it a trustworthy character. The same thing works when your speech undulates from treble to bass. This kind of speech is absolutely fascinating. Same thing with tempo. And if, against the background of a normal pace, you gradually begin to speak faster and faster, without losing contact, you simply “load” the interlocutor, he simply becomes unable to evaluate all the information, and therefore most of it passes without resistance.

4. Intimate voice. An intimate voice is very easy to do. Imagine that your voice is born in the lower abdomen, from the first chakra, that is, from the sexual center. Most people, especially women, respond very favorably to such a voice, no matter what you say.

5. They often ask: “What words should I say to make a person do such and such...” Believe me, there are no magic spells. No “fucking-tibidoh” will help you in hypnosis. Everything is much simpler. You need to listen carefully to the person, remember the words that he uses in speech, and insert them into your statements. That's all!

And further. "Sour lemon!" As soon as you read this phrase, what happened? That's right, salivation increased. So how to provoke sexual experiences in the object of seduction? That's right, with the help of speech. They just need to be described. Your ability to casually and easily describe pleasant erotic experiences in words (for example, sensations from gentle touches, intermittent breathing during arousal, an iridescent sensation of warmth in the body, etc.) will very quickly lead to the fact that your interlocutor will begin to feel these states.

Kinesthetic anchors

This is touching. Gentle and strong, light and fast, long-lasting and persistent...

Want to check how kinesthetic anchors work?

Try, at the moment when everyone in a noisy company is laughing, touch the elbow, knee, shoulder, whatever you can reach, your neighbor or neighbor. Do this at least twice (for example, when telling an anecdote, a good joke). Then it will be enough to touch the same place of this person with the same force so that the person smiles or laughs.

For kinesthetic anchors to work effectively, you need to know a few secrets:

1. Anchors are installed on protruding bones (where there is little soft tissue and fat deposits to reach the same place when reinforced). Choose your knuckles, wrist, elbow, shoulder, shoulder blade, collarbone, knees, pubic bone to place anchors.

2. The touch should be quite noticeable, intense, but not painful or aggressive. It is better for the person not to notice that he is being anchored.

3. An anchor is placed when the emotion just begins and grows. When a person is at the peak of experience, we let go of the hand.

4. Anchors work with constant reinforcement.

Remember some happy experience, some specific event. Once you find yourself in this event, squeeze your thumb in a special way. Hold for a few seconds, release and return to reality. This sequence is very important. Then after some time, squeeze your finger in the same way. What will happen?

In the same way, you can work and anchor states of creativity, inspiration, energy, lightness, joy, and so on.

Kinesthetic anchors are extremely important in seduction and relationship building. As soon as you notice your partner is in a good mood, touch him, take him by the elbow, smile and anchor the positivity. Do this several times. You already have one anchor.

Now, when your partner is in a bad mood, you can easily improve his mood by simply touching his elbow with the same force and intensity. It’s good to add kinesthetic anchors to auditory ones. For example, you describe some kind of sexual experience and see that your partner has also begun to experience it - immediately anchor it. Preferably in a different place, for example on the shoulder. And when you are finally alone, just turn on the anchor - and don’t hesitate!

Anchors of the situation

The most effective anchors are situations in which all channels of perception are involved.

For example, an erotic massage with aromatic oils accompanied by pleasant music engages the auditory and kinesthetic channels simultaneously.

On your partner’s birthday, in the morning, you can put up stickers all over the apartment with love notes with enelpeer content: “You are worthy!”, “You are the best!”, “The Universe is friendly,” “Every day is a new chance,” “Be the first!” , “Be yourself”, “Love!”, “You are my fairy tale”, “Hero-lover”, “Sex God”, “I’m proud of you”, “I need you”... Don’t be afraid to overdo it: what we believe we believe, becomes our reality. Your partner will definitely want to match. And while he walks around the apartment, removing stickers, you hold his hand in a special way. And let positive music play at the same time: “I know for sure: the impossible is possible...”

Try to sit your tired partner on the sofa after a hard day, take off his shoes and socks, put his feet in a basin of warm water, wash them, saying gentle words, dry them with a towel, massage his feet with invigorating menthol cream, kiss each toe... This anchor - aerobatics! After all, all channels of perception are involved here: firstly, a beautiful visual picture when you sit on your knees in front of your partner, admitting (at least for five minutes) to him that he is your master and master, secondly, your tenderness, said under the splash of water - an auditory anchor, thirdly, warm water, foot massage, a terry towel - what the damn kinesthetic needs.

8 NLP: Anchoring Technique for Seduction

Another way you can use anchoring to sleep with the object of desire on the first date.

Ask your potential partner to think of the most interesting, exciting, and joyful experience they've had recently. When you say the word “interesting,” lower your voice and give it an erotic connotation. Nine times out of ten, the target will peck at the auditory anchor and remember the erotic experience. If your partner asks why you need this, say that you want to offer one exciting game that will require a good imagination and a specific memory for feelings.

When he remembers, ask him to close his eyes for a moment. Then ask him to remember what he saw, heard, felt in his body. As the hunted person remembers, watch for changes in his face, breathing, and posture. The face will most likely turn slightly pink; breathing may become more frequent and shallow or, conversely, more rare and deep, the lower lip will slightly increase in size and lower; the body will relax. At this moment, your victim will re-experience all those pleasant erotic feelings that she had when she was actually in that erotic situation. While she is doing this, ask her to raise her finger at the moment when her memories and sensations or feelings reach the top. When the victim raises his finger, reach out with your hand, lightly squeeze his wrist, and at the same time say, “Okay.” Try to do this twice.

Then ask the subject not to think about anything, just relax and sit with his eyes closed. Reach out, squeeze your wrist lightly (just like you did the first time—touch in the same place and with the same intensity) and say, “Okay.” If you did everything correctly, then your partner will have the same erotic experiences (and you will be able to observe the same external manifestations of these experiences) that he experienced at the moment when you squeezed your wrist for the first time.

Now tease the victim with this. Return to normal conversation and then, after a couple of minutes, squeeze her wrist, re-engaging the anchor. Look straight into the eyes, smile while doing so, but do not let go of your wrist. Hold your hand as long as you deem necessary.

You now have a weapon that you can use at any time during the rest of the evening.

After a while, when you are alone, tease the object of your hunt a little again. Without long introductions, look into the eyes and smile knowingly. If the victim asks you to explain your behavior, simply squeeze their wrist lightly and say, “Okay.” And when she begins to experience an erotic state again, hold her wrist with one hand, and your other hand and lips will find what to touch and what to squeeze.

Practice setting an anchor. This takes practice - don't fool yourself. But this thing works great!

Prayer you can see

One master was sitting with his students in the concert audience. He told them:

“You heard a lot of prayers, you said a lot of prayers. Today I would like you to see a prayer.

At that moment the curtain rose and the ballet began.

Homework: “Bifurcation points”

1. Now the main thing. All this sounds and looks very good in the imagination. But until you go out and try these techniques, naturally, nothing will work. Be prepared for the fact that at first the effectiveness will be about 50/50. Rejoice! Notice every time you succeed and put it in the memory of your skills as the most precious pearl of experience!

2. When practicing setting anchors on other people, do not forget that you yourself are the best object to study. How long do you think it will take you to hang yourself with positive anchors?

3. Map your own body and how it feels. If you don’t like being held by the elbow, touched by the tailbone, taken by the arm, urgently anchor the positive in these places - puppy delight, quiet joy, unbridled fun, touching tenderness, the strength of youth, patience in achieving a goal, brutal efficiency! Let your whole body become a magnet for happy touches. So it happens, so it is, so it will be!